My mom thinks that i will get in trouble and do bad and inappropriate things while ichat. Help me i can't convince her i need your help answer quickly please?How do i convince my parents to let me ichat?
Just tell her all your friends have it and you want to iChat with them. I love iChatting!How do i convince my parents to let me ichat?
Well you can't necessarily make her let you do it, she has to trust you enough first. And from what you wrote, it doesn't seem like she completely trusts you because she thinks you might do inappropriate things... but it depends on the mother. With my mother, if I try to convince her, she'll just get mad and I won't have a chance of getting anything I want.
~Elyse
Ummm promise her that you won't do anything bad. If that's not working then give up. She's only trying to protect you so don't hold it against her. Good luck kid.
just do it anyway lol. i cant get my ichat to work :(
Friday, July 30, 2010
How can I get my parents to stop nagging me about church?
My parents are very religious, but for the past few months, I've stopped going to church. They're constantly urging me to go, which I understand, but they've also called me ';morally bankrupt'; and keep trying to ';convert me back'; to Christianity.
I don't want to tell them I've stopped believing in God or anything, because I don't think I have. I'm very confused about religion right now but it's not a top priority, and I'm tired of them trying to make me feel guilty about it.How can I get my parents to stop nagging me about church?
Well your parents are wrong for trying to push you into something you dont wanna do because most of the time it just leaves you angrier , but i do think you should keep your faith, but its something you have to figure out on your own. Just remember God will always be there for you and only wants to help you in your life and make you happier!How can I get my parents to stop nagging me about church?
I was in the same position, actually. Use the time that you don't waste going to church on studying your religion, and find all the flaws that you can - i.e. the many, many contradictions in the bible, the fact that the bible claims that the earth is 4,000 years old, and that dinosaurs didn't exist.
You need to let them know that you are unsure of a lot of your religion's faults. The fact that you are confused about religion (and that you use proper grammar ;D ) shows that you are much more intelligent than the average populace... you have learned to question things much more in depth and look at things from a different perspective.
However, your battle with the church will not end after you stop going - the church I used to go to will still pay a visit during the worst times (like during dinner, or when we are going to bed) to give me a card, and to ask me to come back to church (I don't know why, possibly they aren't getting as many donations as they used to).
I wish you luck in this difficult journey.
Well as I was growing up and living in my parents house I had to follow their rules and that was I had to attend church.
You don't mention how old you are so. you can tell your parents what you stated in your question. That you are confused about religion and you need to figure out what you believe. Then go out and try out different religions and beliefs, do some reading about the faith you have been brought up in and explore other world beliefs.
The easiest way to stop the nagging is to go to church with them. Then pick out some passages from the readings in church and ask them to explain the meaning of each and how it applies in modern times.
Do this every week.
Very soon they will be asking to you go by yourself and stop bothering them with impossible questions.
How can you get them to stop nagging? Go. haha! jk! Try sitting them down and telling them you respect their decision and effort to try to make you more religious, but you are confused about who you are and what you believe in. Maybe try humoring them and going to mass once, maybe you will have a different outlook. Or try a different church. Maybe it's not the religion but the Priest/Church?
I too am confused if I believe in Christianity... I believe in God, but a dude made an ark and had 2 of every kind of animal on it? PLEASE!!!! I guess I am more of a literal person though, I need to see it to believe it! I believe God makes things happen in my life, so I believe in him. But I am still not quite sure about the rest of it! Good luck to you!
You should just be honest with your parents and tell them how you feel right now. I come a very religious family so I absolutely understand where you are coming from. You should also tell them that them nagging you is just making it worse and that if you are going to come to church that it is your own decision not something they should make you do, because really what is the point anyways.
If you feel guilty about it I promise it is not your parents doing it. It is the Holy Spirit working on you and you should listen. If you ignore him long enough he will stop trying. Then where will you be?? Truly lost. You need to search your heart and see what answers God has for you. Your parents are right and they are doing what God has intended for them to do. ';Train your child the way they should go';. Your parents love you and you are blessed to have them. You should be greatful. I would hate for something horrible to happen in your life to bring you back to God but it does happen. Wake up and get back into church where you know you belong. You do not have to go to their church, find one you feel is your church home and go there. Just go...
tell them the truth, that you are in cross roads right now. tell them you will not be going to church, for you dont want to enter the house of the lord as an non believer. however ask them to suggest some sort of prayers or reading you can do at home ( alone) to get you attempt to beleive again. people like when they can provide suggestion, makes em feel like they're in control
You don't have to go to church to be a Christian! Christianity isn't about religion, it's about a relationship -- with God. I don't go to church, I'm not religious, but I know Jesus. Through knowing Him, I'm learning how to be like Him. I'm learning how to live my life in a godly way, and not a worldly way. God is the most important and amazing thing in my life, I honestly don't know what my life would be like without Him -- and I don't want to find out.
Just because you choose not to go to church definitely doesn't mean you're not a Christian or ';morally bankrupt.'; Honestly, that's ridiculous. Christianity isn't church! It's CHRIST! It's knowing Christ, and living like He did.
Lol... sorry if I'm coming on a bit strong, I just feel strongly about this.
Anyhow, God bless you, and I hope this has helped you!
Explain to your parents that you dont want to go to church.
Say you are responsible and you still believe in God, but you have other things to do or whatever, and try to convince them that church at your age is boring, or any other word.
Hope I helped!
Are you catholic? If u are that might be why church doesn't seem that worth going to. Maybe the problem might be because church doesn't seem very enjoyable. And yes church should be a place where you can enjoy being in the presents of God. Maybe you should change church's try A Pentecostal one, or Baptist.
sing them a song, Jesus loves me i do know, i read the bible and it told me so, i read the bible and it said, i'm going to HELL when i'm dead....hell satin
im a christian and when your parents want you to come to church its because they love you. but making you feel bad or guilty is not what christians are suppose to do! so tell them what theyre doing if they dont already know and try going to church!(YOU MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING!!!)
Just tell them that you practicing religion in your own way and that's what matters. I'm still dealing with this issue with my family and that excuse gets them to back off for a while.
just talk to them.
that's all you can do.
Because they are so religious they are just trying to keep up with your spiritual health. They aren't tryin to nag you; they just care a lot.
I hope you figure out your religious preferences :)
I can't say that I don't disagree with your choice, however it is just that. Your choice. Explain to them that they cannot force you to believe but you are starting to question things and you need some space and time.
Sing them this song:
';I love Satan. Satin is cool. Satain is my pal!';
Make sure to do a little diddy with it.
Tell them your agnostic and dont want to go to church just now.
Jesus said himself that God is not in church.
they just love you very much and dont want to see you burn in hell.
try to talk to thema bout it. dont lie to them
you should go watch religioulous with them and show them a viewpoint
Hun, please read everything at this link: www.needGod.com
If you are living with your parents you should respect their wishes and attend church with them. I'm sure it would mean a lot to them. If you are independently living on your own then tell them thanks for being concerned but you've got to live your own life.
For Cruorem. What is your source? Where do you get 4000 years in the bible as the age of the earth? You can calculate that there is a span of approximately 4000 years from the creation of Adam to the birth of Jesus. And there have been approximately 2000 years since the birth of Jesus to the present day. Therefore, there have been approximately 6000 years from the creation of Adam to the present day. The important information that the bible preserves is not the age of the earth but the time line from the creation of Adam to the present day. And also, nowhere in the bible does it say that there were never any dinosaurs. It does say, however, that at some point early on God decided to give man dominion over the beasts, inferring that before then man did not have dominion over the beasts. Dinosaurs at first, then no dinosaurs? Who knows. We shouldn't focus on what the bible doesn't say, but instead we should study and try to understand what the bible does say.
why have you stopped going to church?
it is your choice whether you want to go or not. especially if you are living on your own.
do you still read the Bible. if you don't go to church, you might consider reading the Bible on a regular basis so that you can tell your parents that right now you are sort of confused but you have been reading the Bible. also, you could pray that the Lord help you and guide you through this time.
I hope this is of help to you
--Lylspots
I don't want to tell them I've stopped believing in God or anything, because I don't think I have. I'm very confused about religion right now but it's not a top priority, and I'm tired of them trying to make me feel guilty about it.How can I get my parents to stop nagging me about church?
Well your parents are wrong for trying to push you into something you dont wanna do because most of the time it just leaves you angrier , but i do think you should keep your faith, but its something you have to figure out on your own. Just remember God will always be there for you and only wants to help you in your life and make you happier!How can I get my parents to stop nagging me about church?
I was in the same position, actually. Use the time that you don't waste going to church on studying your religion, and find all the flaws that you can - i.e. the many, many contradictions in the bible, the fact that the bible claims that the earth is 4,000 years old, and that dinosaurs didn't exist.
You need to let them know that you are unsure of a lot of your religion's faults. The fact that you are confused about religion (and that you use proper grammar ;D ) shows that you are much more intelligent than the average populace... you have learned to question things much more in depth and look at things from a different perspective.
However, your battle with the church will not end after you stop going - the church I used to go to will still pay a visit during the worst times (like during dinner, or when we are going to bed) to give me a card, and to ask me to come back to church (I don't know why, possibly they aren't getting as many donations as they used to).
I wish you luck in this difficult journey.
Well as I was growing up and living in my parents house I had to follow their rules and that was I had to attend church.
You don't mention how old you are so. you can tell your parents what you stated in your question. That you are confused about religion and you need to figure out what you believe. Then go out and try out different religions and beliefs, do some reading about the faith you have been brought up in and explore other world beliefs.
The easiest way to stop the nagging is to go to church with them. Then pick out some passages from the readings in church and ask them to explain the meaning of each and how it applies in modern times.
Do this every week.
Very soon they will be asking to you go by yourself and stop bothering them with impossible questions.
How can you get them to stop nagging? Go. haha! jk! Try sitting them down and telling them you respect their decision and effort to try to make you more religious, but you are confused about who you are and what you believe in. Maybe try humoring them and going to mass once, maybe you will have a different outlook. Or try a different church. Maybe it's not the religion but the Priest/Church?
I too am confused if I believe in Christianity... I believe in God, but a dude made an ark and had 2 of every kind of animal on it? PLEASE!!!! I guess I am more of a literal person though, I need to see it to believe it! I believe God makes things happen in my life, so I believe in him. But I am still not quite sure about the rest of it! Good luck to you!
You should just be honest with your parents and tell them how you feel right now. I come a very religious family so I absolutely understand where you are coming from. You should also tell them that them nagging you is just making it worse and that if you are going to come to church that it is your own decision not something they should make you do, because really what is the point anyways.
If you feel guilty about it I promise it is not your parents doing it. It is the Holy Spirit working on you and you should listen. If you ignore him long enough he will stop trying. Then where will you be?? Truly lost. You need to search your heart and see what answers God has for you. Your parents are right and they are doing what God has intended for them to do. ';Train your child the way they should go';. Your parents love you and you are blessed to have them. You should be greatful. I would hate for something horrible to happen in your life to bring you back to God but it does happen. Wake up and get back into church where you know you belong. You do not have to go to their church, find one you feel is your church home and go there. Just go...
tell them the truth, that you are in cross roads right now. tell them you will not be going to church, for you dont want to enter the house of the lord as an non believer. however ask them to suggest some sort of prayers or reading you can do at home ( alone) to get you attempt to beleive again. people like when they can provide suggestion, makes em feel like they're in control
You don't have to go to church to be a Christian! Christianity isn't about religion, it's about a relationship -- with God. I don't go to church, I'm not religious, but I know Jesus. Through knowing Him, I'm learning how to be like Him. I'm learning how to live my life in a godly way, and not a worldly way. God is the most important and amazing thing in my life, I honestly don't know what my life would be like without Him -- and I don't want to find out.
Just because you choose not to go to church definitely doesn't mean you're not a Christian or ';morally bankrupt.'; Honestly, that's ridiculous. Christianity isn't church! It's CHRIST! It's knowing Christ, and living like He did.
Lol... sorry if I'm coming on a bit strong, I just feel strongly about this.
Anyhow, God bless you, and I hope this has helped you!
Explain to your parents that you dont want to go to church.
Say you are responsible and you still believe in God, but you have other things to do or whatever, and try to convince them that church at your age is boring, or any other word.
Hope I helped!
Are you catholic? If u are that might be why church doesn't seem that worth going to. Maybe the problem might be because church doesn't seem very enjoyable. And yes church should be a place where you can enjoy being in the presents of God. Maybe you should change church's try A Pentecostal one, or Baptist.
sing them a song, Jesus loves me i do know, i read the bible and it told me so, i read the bible and it said, i'm going to HELL when i'm dead....hell satin
im a christian and when your parents want you to come to church its because they love you. but making you feel bad or guilty is not what christians are suppose to do! so tell them what theyre doing if they dont already know and try going to church!(YOU MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING!!!)
Just tell them that you practicing religion in your own way and that's what matters. I'm still dealing with this issue with my family and that excuse gets them to back off for a while.
just talk to them.
that's all you can do.
Because they are so religious they are just trying to keep up with your spiritual health. They aren't tryin to nag you; they just care a lot.
I hope you figure out your religious preferences :)
I can't say that I don't disagree with your choice, however it is just that. Your choice. Explain to them that they cannot force you to believe but you are starting to question things and you need some space and time.
Sing them this song:
';I love Satan. Satin is cool. Satain is my pal!';
Make sure to do a little diddy with it.
Tell them your agnostic and dont want to go to church just now.
Jesus said himself that God is not in church.
they just love you very much and dont want to see you burn in hell.
try to talk to thema bout it. dont lie to them
you should go watch religioulous with them and show them a viewpoint
Hun, please read everything at this link: www.needGod.com
If you are living with your parents you should respect their wishes and attend church with them. I'm sure it would mean a lot to them. If you are independently living on your own then tell them thanks for being concerned but you've got to live your own life.
For Cruorem. What is your source? Where do you get 4000 years in the bible as the age of the earth? You can calculate that there is a span of approximately 4000 years from the creation of Adam to the birth of Jesus. And there have been approximately 2000 years since the birth of Jesus to the present day. Therefore, there have been approximately 6000 years from the creation of Adam to the present day. The important information that the bible preserves is not the age of the earth but the time line from the creation of Adam to the present day. And also, nowhere in the bible does it say that there were never any dinosaurs. It does say, however, that at some point early on God decided to give man dominion over the beasts, inferring that before then man did not have dominion over the beasts. Dinosaurs at first, then no dinosaurs? Who knows. We shouldn't focus on what the bible doesn't say, but instead we should study and try to understand what the bible does say.
why have you stopped going to church?
it is your choice whether you want to go or not. especially if you are living on your own.
do you still read the Bible. if you don't go to church, you might consider reading the Bible on a regular basis so that you can tell your parents that right now you are sort of confused but you have been reading the Bible. also, you could pray that the Lord help you and guide you through this time.
I hope this is of help to you
--Lyl
How can I convince my parents to let me have a facebook?
They think that something bad will happen to me if I have one and I have been trying to tell them that it is safer than myspace. Any ideas on how to convince them, besides 'everyone has one!' (that never works) ?How can I convince my parents to let me have a facebook?
telling them anything about myspace prob wont help. just tell them you wont add//accept anyone you don't know and wont write a lot of information on you even say you wont post any bad pictures and you will be mature about it.How can I convince my parents to let me have a facebook?
omg dude i have the same EXACT problem...
i always try:
everybody has one
i wont put any information about myself
i wont put any pictures of me
i will make my page private
... it never works!! lol
facebook isn't really THAT cool.
but if you really want one, I don't see the big deal.. facebook is like 99% safe if you're smart about it. Put everything on private then nobody can see anything unless you add them as a friend.
If my statistic that I made up doesn't work, show them this post and tell them they have my permission ;] lol
say its less dangerous then myspace
telling them anything about myspace prob wont help. just tell them you wont add//accept anyone you don't know and wont write a lot of information on you even say you wont post any bad pictures and you will be mature about it.How can I convince my parents to let me have a facebook?
omg dude i have the same EXACT problem...
i always try:
everybody has one
i wont put any information about myself
i wont put any pictures of me
i will make my page private
... it never works!! lol
facebook isn't really THAT cool.
but if you really want one, I don't see the big deal.. facebook is like 99% safe if you're smart about it. Put everything on private then nobody can see anything unless you add them as a friend.
If my statistic that I made up doesn't work, show them this post and tell them they have my permission ;] lol
say its less dangerous then myspace
How can you persuade your parents into letting a friend sleep over?
The fair is this weekend (October 31st) and I want my friend to sleep over so how do I persuade/convince my parents into him spending the night?How can you persuade your parents into letting a friend sleep over?
Tell them what you want to do. Make sure your parents meet him ahead of time. If they don't have it, give them his parents phone number and address so they know that permission is given on that side of things.
Solve as many of the problems and questions before you talk with them as you can and then explain that you won't be going out and doing insane things on Halloween like lots of kids do.
Get their trust and then take a deep breath and ask.How can you persuade your parents into letting a friend sleep over?
offer to clean the whole house and do extra chores explain why you want him to sleep over. you have to give to get
Tell them what you want to do. Make sure your parents meet him ahead of time. If they don't have it, give them his parents phone number and address so they know that permission is given on that side of things.
Solve as many of the problems and questions before you talk with them as you can and then explain that you won't be going out and doing insane things on Halloween like lots of kids do.
Get their trust and then take a deep breath and ask.How can you persuade your parents into letting a friend sleep over?
offer to clean the whole house and do extra chores explain why you want him to sleep over. you have to give to get
How hard is it to change a parenting plan once it's been in place for several years?
My ex spends no quality time with our 10 year old son while he's there. He is more interested in going out fishing etc. while his 90 year old mother watches our son. It's been 7 days at my house and 7 days at dad's house but it is really starting to wear on our son. No rules to speak of at dad's, no enforcement of rules I have made for our son. Very long story, basically dad doesn't care about his own son's best interest. However he will buy him whatever he wants....Bottom line, this parenting plan is not working and needs to be revisited.How hard is it to change a parenting plan once it's been in place for several years?
You had married a very selfish man but I think you already knew this. He does what he wants, when he wants. And your son doesn't fit into his plans. When your son goes to his Dad's, send along activity books, reading books, games, gameboy, and anything you can think of to occupy his time. I feel sad for him because this is what he's going to remember when he grows up. You may need to go back to court. Keep a record of where he goes and how much time your son is forced to spend with the elderly grandma.How hard is it to change a parenting plan once it's been in place for several years?
It will be hard to do, but worthwhile for your son. He needs consistency.
It might not be that hard to do. Talk to your ex first. See if you can work something out without going to court and hiring lawyers. Don't be confrontational or tell him he's a bad Dad. Just say ';I think our son might benefit from having a little more stability. Could we try a new arrangement for the next three months to see how it works out'; Suggest one day or night a week with Dad and maybe every other weekend. Or even one day every weekend.
You can't force your husband to follow the way YOU parent. Obviously he has no parenting plan but you can't make him have one, he is your EX and is entitled to parent the way he feels like parenting just as you parent your way. You don't get to dictate what goes on in your ex's home just like he doesn't get to dictate what goes on in YOUR home. Yes your son is going to wind up the loser in this deal but you have no say in what your ex does.
I'm assuming this is a court ordered parenting plan? It might be easier to change than you think, but that would depend on the types of changes you're looking for.
If it is not working then it should be able to be revised. At least Grandma is getting some quality time. I bet a 10 year old is a handful for her..
You had married a very selfish man but I think you already knew this. He does what he wants, when he wants. And your son doesn't fit into his plans. When your son goes to his Dad's, send along activity books, reading books, games, gameboy, and anything you can think of to occupy his time. I feel sad for him because this is what he's going to remember when he grows up. You may need to go back to court. Keep a record of where he goes and how much time your son is forced to spend with the elderly grandma.How hard is it to change a parenting plan once it's been in place for several years?
It will be hard to do, but worthwhile for your son. He needs consistency.
It might not be that hard to do. Talk to your ex first. See if you can work something out without going to court and hiring lawyers. Don't be confrontational or tell him he's a bad Dad. Just say ';I think our son might benefit from having a little more stability. Could we try a new arrangement for the next three months to see how it works out'; Suggest one day or night a week with Dad and maybe every other weekend. Or even one day every weekend.
You can't force your husband to follow the way YOU parent. Obviously he has no parenting plan but you can't make him have one, he is your EX and is entitled to parent the way he feels like parenting just as you parent your way. You don't get to dictate what goes on in your ex's home just like he doesn't get to dictate what goes on in YOUR home. Yes your son is going to wind up the loser in this deal but you have no say in what your ex does.
I'm assuming this is a court ordered parenting plan? It might be easier to change than you think, but that would depend on the types of changes you're looking for.
If it is not working then it should be able to be revised. At least Grandma is getting some quality time. I bet a 10 year old is a handful for her..
Why is marriage of potential parents considered necessary for the welfare of children?
In other words, how does having your mother married to your father provide you critical benefits during your formative years?Why is marriage of potential parents considered necessary for the welfare of children?
Marriage provide a sense of security for the child.
Even in a solid marriage, the child always has an underlying fear that somehow, someday Mommy and Daddy won't be there. The reason for this is not always death. Divorce or desertion is also a fear.
When Mommy and Daddy aren't married, desertion become a primary fear. First off, kids just ';know'; these things, but in actuality there are usually little clues, many non-verbal, that the relationship between Mom and Dad is temporary.
Married couples show (or should) permanence in a way that is visible to the child. It is OK to fight, but you MUST make an effort to visibly and passionately make up -- in front of the children. These acts aare VITAL to bringing up healthy children. They learn WHAT forgiveness really is, and they learn how to EXPRESS it. If it is OK for Dad to drop his stoic attitude and apologize to Mom, then it is OK for me to apologize to my friend. Kids learn how to be married from watching their parents!
And this example is GONE from those unmarried households because there is always that little undercurrent of ';temporary residency'; -- I don't need to forgive you, because I can leave anytime I want. So you do things MY way, or I'm outta here!
This example does NOT translate into a potential future solid marriage for your children. It increases their own natural selfishness, and in fact makes them bad partners -- married or not.
And of course these same ideals presented in a married home spill over into other life areas -- like making friend and keeping jobs. Statistically, children from unmarried households are less friendly and less likely to maintain a steady career, as well as exhibt ';serial monogomy'; through a seris of failed relationships and divorces.
Why is marriage of potential parents considered necessary for the welfare of children?
It doesn't, I don't believe people ';have'; to be married to create a loving and supportive family. The whole idea of you ';must be married to have a family'; is an old school way of thinking. I have friends that have been with their significant others for years and have a family together without being married. Their children receive the same benefits as any other child with married parents. A piece of paper and a shared last name have nothing to do with your ability to raise children.
It is because statistics have shown that married parents are more likely to continue together than unmarried parents. You can argue all you want about divorce statistics, but at least half of folks who are married stay together. Those who just live together, only 5-8% (depending on whose stats you read) are still together by the time the child is school aged. There is simply a greater level of commitment amongst those who are married vs. those who are not.
Heck even among trailer trash, the married folks are still more likely to be together for the next 20 years than the couple who is shacked up together.
Marriage does not make successful parents or a a successful family. Like parents who fight or if one is abusive (physically or mentally) or even parents who may be in the house but aren't supportive or available to the kids.
But if the parents are together and at home, the kids would benefit by seeing how parents work together, share, love, and how a family functions. A boy would learn how a man lives day to day and a girl would learn how to be a mom. The kids would also have 2 people to which they could ask questions and get different answers.
Because marriage is still a social norm for long-term partners. As anyone who did not ';fit in'; while growing up is painfully aware of, ';fitting in'; is important, especially for an individual who is still growing and trying to find themselves. Feeling that your family is somehow ';different'; - ';abnormal'; - may affect you in a negative way. Again, it might not; it depends on the individuals involved. But you asked a general question, so I'm giving a general answer.
i think this is an old fashioned theory that if the parents aren't married, then the kids will be 'bastards' in society. it use to put a certain stigma onto kids of unmarried parents. i think with all the unmarried, shacking up, bed hopping that goes on, it doesn't really matter anymore. we are a society of few values anymore.
what if you are a white chick and a mexican man valerie x? I'm not married and we are together but we have two kids. Dangit! Oh wooesh! Thanks Val!
If they hate each other and fight all the time, then I don't think it has any benefits.
Marriage provide a sense of security for the child.
Even in a solid marriage, the child always has an underlying fear that somehow, someday Mommy and Daddy won't be there. The reason for this is not always death. Divorce or desertion is also a fear.
When Mommy and Daddy aren't married, desertion become a primary fear. First off, kids just ';know'; these things, but in actuality there are usually little clues, many non-verbal, that the relationship between Mom and Dad is temporary.
Married couples show (or should) permanence in a way that is visible to the child. It is OK to fight, but you MUST make an effort to visibly and passionately make up -- in front of the children. These acts aare VITAL to bringing up healthy children. They learn WHAT forgiveness really is, and they learn how to EXPRESS it. If it is OK for Dad to drop his stoic attitude and apologize to Mom, then it is OK for me to apologize to my friend. Kids learn how to be married from watching their parents!
And this example is GONE from those unmarried households because there is always that little undercurrent of ';temporary residency'; -- I don't need to forgive you, because I can leave anytime I want. So you do things MY way, or I'm outta here!
This example does NOT translate into a potential future solid marriage for your children. It increases their own natural selfishness, and in fact makes them bad partners -- married or not.
And of course these same ideals presented in a married home spill over into other life areas -- like making friend and keeping jobs. Statistically, children from unmarried households are less friendly and less likely to maintain a steady career, as well as exhibt ';serial monogomy'; through a seris of failed relationships and divorces.
Why is marriage of potential parents considered necessary for the welfare of children?
It doesn't, I don't believe people ';have'; to be married to create a loving and supportive family. The whole idea of you ';must be married to have a family'; is an old school way of thinking. I have friends that have been with their significant others for years and have a family together without being married. Their children receive the same benefits as any other child with married parents. A piece of paper and a shared last name have nothing to do with your ability to raise children.
It is because statistics have shown that married parents are more likely to continue together than unmarried parents. You can argue all you want about divorce statistics, but at least half of folks who are married stay together. Those who just live together, only 5-8% (depending on whose stats you read) are still together by the time the child is school aged. There is simply a greater level of commitment amongst those who are married vs. those who are not.
Heck even among trailer trash, the married folks are still more likely to be together for the next 20 years than the couple who is shacked up together.
Marriage does not make successful parents or a a successful family. Like parents who fight or if one is abusive (physically or mentally) or even parents who may be in the house but aren't supportive or available to the kids.
But if the parents are together and at home, the kids would benefit by seeing how parents work together, share, love, and how a family functions. A boy would learn how a man lives day to day and a girl would learn how to be a mom. The kids would also have 2 people to which they could ask questions and get different answers.
Because marriage is still a social norm for long-term partners. As anyone who did not ';fit in'; while growing up is painfully aware of, ';fitting in'; is important, especially for an individual who is still growing and trying to find themselves. Feeling that your family is somehow ';different'; - ';abnormal'; - may affect you in a negative way. Again, it might not; it depends on the individuals involved. But you asked a general question, so I'm giving a general answer.
i think this is an old fashioned theory that if the parents aren't married, then the kids will be 'bastards' in society. it use to put a certain stigma onto kids of unmarried parents. i think with all the unmarried, shacking up, bed hopping that goes on, it doesn't really matter anymore. we are a society of few values anymore.
what if you are a white chick and a mexican man valerie x? I'm not married and we are together but we have two kids. Dangit! Oh wooesh! Thanks Val!
If they hate each other and fight all the time, then I don't think it has any benefits.
How do I convince my parents to let me go trick or treating alone with my friend?
I already asked them and they said definitley not and if i ask them again they wont let me go at all! What can i do? Please Help!!!How do I convince my parents to let me go trick or treating alone with my friend?
If you have a mobile keep it with you so they can keep in contact with you, it might be annoying but at least you can still have fun!
Maybe you should tell them the time you will be back, and let them know exactly where you are going.
if this still doesnt work, how about, ask if your parents will drop you and your friend off one side of a street or something, and when your done with that area, your parents take you to another part of the neighbourhood, so you and your friend will still be on your own but you wont have to be wandering around in the dark to another area.
Hope you're allowed to go! Happy Halloween!
If you have a mobile keep it with you so they can keep in contact with you, it might be annoying but at least you can still have fun!
Maybe you should tell them the time you will be back, and let them know exactly where you are going.
if this still doesnt work, how about, ask if your parents will drop you and your friend off one side of a street or something, and when your done with that area, your parents take you to another part of the neighbourhood, so you and your friend will still be on your own but you wont have to be wandering around in the dark to another area.
Hope you're allowed to go! Happy Halloween!
Parenting, learning from your mistakes, do we let our children make the same mistakes or do we teach them not?
what are peoples thoughts on this
ie teach so they don't make the same mistakes but then theres the whole thought of we are what we are from learning from our mistakes and growing and becoming a better person as a result ie its made us strongerParenting, learning from your mistakes, do we let our children make the same mistakes or do we teach them not?
We always want better for our children then we ourselves had.Parenting, learning from your mistakes, do we let our children make the same mistakes or do we teach them not?
There are plenty of mistakes to go around.
Of course you should try to teach your children what you know.
But, even now, knowing everything you know, you are likely to make a new mistake, anyway, right? Either because the lesson didn't quite set with you, or because you're in a new situation.
Even if you teach your child everything you know, s/he's likely to need to experience things themselves, in some situations, to get the lesson to have meaning for them -and- s/he's likely to make new mistakes that you never even thought of.
I think the most important thing to teach our children is that mistakes are for learning.
Don't worry - they'll make plenty of mistakes of their own that you never thought of and will have to deal with!
i HOPE my son dosen't make the same mistakes i did. Heck no!! i will deffinately teach my son the opposite from the way i was.
I have two children aged thirteen and nine. We have tried hard to avoid them having the problems/ mistakes that we had as children but have almost ended up going to the opposite extreme. Both my husband and I were academic but lonely at school so we did our best to ensure our children made friends easily. The trouble is that my thirteen year old is now failing school tests which should be easy as she is spending too much time socialising and not enough studying.
How do you get the balance?
Wisdom comes from hindsight and experience, but you don't have to always put your hand into the fire to know its hot.
I think it is important to make allowance for some mistakes, but to prepare my children to know how to see danger. No one ever died from a broken arm when falling off a skateboard, but there is danger when a total stranger asks you to get into his car. It requires a lot of patience and tact.
It depends on the severity of the concequences and the age of the child. No matter how much we may try to steer our kids away from making some of the same mistakes we made, they will still make some of the same mistakes. Natural consequences and making your own mistakes can be the best teacher. As parents, when that happens, the worse thing we can so is say ';I told you so';. The best thing to do is be there for support so they know they can depend and trust you more, and just maybe, the next time they will listen. It all comes down to kids taking responsibility for their behavior. Well, this seems to be working for me. Every parent and every child is different.
teach them to ''''think for themselves'''. that way they will make their own decisions and mistakes. they may have different things to learn than you because they are not you so what worked for you may not even work for them.
I was taught to learn from my mistakes AND other people's mistakes.
I owe a lot of who I am to the fact that I've seen the consequences for other people's behavior and decided that I didnt need to make the same mistake myself.
I've never done drugs, never smoked, rarely drink, dont get in the car with someone who has been drinking, always stayed away from abusive and controlling men, have never cheated on my husband or boyfriends prior to him, never had sex until I was with the man I married... and so on.
It doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure out ';gee, it sucked for that person when they did that, so I'll just NOT do that myself';
I don't think it's an issue of making mistakes. We have to teach the children 2 things:
1) As parents, we DO make mistakes
2) When we do make mistakes, we ADMIT mistakes
Children must see that in us and they will naturally learn and will also not commit the mistakes we made in the past.
You can teach them to not make mistakes but they will make mistakes anyways no matter how hard you try to teach them not to or how hard you try to protect them from life (and if you try too hard they may be too afraid to come to you for help out of a fear of disappointing you when they have gotten themselves into trouble). It is best to be a good example of what happiness is and can be and also to keep lines of communication open with them - that way you can help them to learn from their mistakes.
Teaching them is good but it won't make them perfect although hopefully it will make them better than they would have been. We all make mistakes especially when we are teenagers but it is part of life and hopefully we have good parents to be there for us when we fall.
Both things are important to growth and development - being taught by parents and by learning from our experience.
Children will make mistakes it is by human nature. You do have to teach them right from wrong and teach them to think for themselves and hope that everything you have instilled in them they take to heart. I don't see them as mistakes I see them as growing pains. I didn't regret it when I did it so why 15 years later am I going to regret.
you can only tell them your own experiences and hope they take them on board, at the end of the day you only truly learn from your own mistakes!
What kind of parent would let their kids repeat their mistakes?? I'd personally try to help my kids learn from my mistakes so they don't make the same ones I did. There does come a point in time where it's necessary for them to learn from their mistakes, but if it something like drugs, alcohol, sex as a teenager, or things to that effect then please teach them before it's too late. Some lessons parents are responsible for making sure their kids never HAVE to learn the hard way.
Life is ALL about making decisions.... Teach your children to make good decisions and weight the consequences tied to each decision... Most people make them out of rash, emotional influences instead of thinking things out... A good moral and ethical foundation is the best thing you can provide them... It will be the foundation for most of their decisions...
It is my belief to teach my 17 year old son of the big mistakes I have learned from. The small mistakes he needs to learn for himself in order to become the person he is capable to be.spots
ie teach so they don't make the same mistakes but then theres the whole thought of we are what we are from learning from our mistakes and growing and becoming a better person as a result ie its made us strongerParenting, learning from your mistakes, do we let our children make the same mistakes or do we teach them not?
We always want better for our children then we ourselves had.Parenting, learning from your mistakes, do we let our children make the same mistakes or do we teach them not?
There are plenty of mistakes to go around.
Of course you should try to teach your children what you know.
But, even now, knowing everything you know, you are likely to make a new mistake, anyway, right? Either because the lesson didn't quite set with you, or because you're in a new situation.
Even if you teach your child everything you know, s/he's likely to need to experience things themselves, in some situations, to get the lesson to have meaning for them -and- s/he's likely to make new mistakes that you never even thought of.
I think the most important thing to teach our children is that mistakes are for learning.
Don't worry - they'll make plenty of mistakes of their own that you never thought of and will have to deal with!
i HOPE my son dosen't make the same mistakes i did. Heck no!! i will deffinately teach my son the opposite from the way i was.
I have two children aged thirteen and nine. We have tried hard to avoid them having the problems/ mistakes that we had as children but have almost ended up going to the opposite extreme. Both my husband and I were academic but lonely at school so we did our best to ensure our children made friends easily. The trouble is that my thirteen year old is now failing school tests which should be easy as she is spending too much time socialising and not enough studying.
How do you get the balance?
Wisdom comes from hindsight and experience, but you don't have to always put your hand into the fire to know its hot.
I think it is important to make allowance for some mistakes, but to prepare my children to know how to see danger. No one ever died from a broken arm when falling off a skateboard, but there is danger when a total stranger asks you to get into his car. It requires a lot of patience and tact.
It depends on the severity of the concequences and the age of the child. No matter how much we may try to steer our kids away from making some of the same mistakes we made, they will still make some of the same mistakes. Natural consequences and making your own mistakes can be the best teacher. As parents, when that happens, the worse thing we can so is say ';I told you so';. The best thing to do is be there for support so they know they can depend and trust you more, and just maybe, the next time they will listen. It all comes down to kids taking responsibility for their behavior. Well, this seems to be working for me. Every parent and every child is different.
teach them to ''''think for themselves'''. that way they will make their own decisions and mistakes. they may have different things to learn than you because they are not you so what worked for you may not even work for them.
I was taught to learn from my mistakes AND other people's mistakes.
I owe a lot of who I am to the fact that I've seen the consequences for other people's behavior and decided that I didnt need to make the same mistake myself.
I've never done drugs, never smoked, rarely drink, dont get in the car with someone who has been drinking, always stayed away from abusive and controlling men, have never cheated on my husband or boyfriends prior to him, never had sex until I was with the man I married... and so on.
It doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure out ';gee, it sucked for that person when they did that, so I'll just NOT do that myself';
I don't think it's an issue of making mistakes. We have to teach the children 2 things:
1) As parents, we DO make mistakes
2) When we do make mistakes, we ADMIT mistakes
Children must see that in us and they will naturally learn and will also not commit the mistakes we made in the past.
You can teach them to not make mistakes but they will make mistakes anyways no matter how hard you try to teach them not to or how hard you try to protect them from life (and if you try too hard they may be too afraid to come to you for help out of a fear of disappointing you when they have gotten themselves into trouble). It is best to be a good example of what happiness is and can be and also to keep lines of communication open with them - that way you can help them to learn from their mistakes.
Teaching them is good but it won't make them perfect although hopefully it will make them better than they would have been. We all make mistakes especially when we are teenagers but it is part of life and hopefully we have good parents to be there for us when we fall.
Both things are important to growth and development - being taught by parents and by learning from our experience.
Children will make mistakes it is by human nature. You do have to teach them right from wrong and teach them to think for themselves and hope that everything you have instilled in them they take to heart. I don't see them as mistakes I see them as growing pains. I didn't regret it when I did it so why 15 years later am I going to regret.
you can only tell them your own experiences and hope they take them on board, at the end of the day you only truly learn from your own mistakes!
What kind of parent would let their kids repeat their mistakes?? I'd personally try to help my kids learn from my mistakes so they don't make the same ones I did. There does come a point in time where it's necessary for them to learn from their mistakes, but if it something like drugs, alcohol, sex as a teenager, or things to that effect then please teach them before it's too late. Some lessons parents are responsible for making sure their kids never HAVE to learn the hard way.
Life is ALL about making decisions.... Teach your children to make good decisions and weight the consequences tied to each decision... Most people make them out of rash, emotional influences instead of thinking things out... A good moral and ethical foundation is the best thing you can provide them... It will be the foundation for most of their decisions...
It is my belief to teach my 17 year old son of the big mistakes I have learned from. The small mistakes he needs to learn for himself in order to become the person he is capable to be.
Parenting Classes Are they Helpful?
I am going to be taking on in my home but not sure what to expect from them. Can anyone help me ?Parenting Classes Are they Helpful?
I'm a mom of 5 and I can tell you, parenting classes are great. I've taken 4 in the past 7 years. And I used to be part of something called 'Parents as Teachers' where someone comes to your home and teaches you how to play fun educational games with your kids. I much preferred the at-home class. It's more interactive and personalized because the teacher can actually see your kids and how they are. Then you aren't just getting a text-book response on how to handle something.Parenting Classes Are they Helpful?
Parenting classes are helpful, even if you consider yourself a good parent. You can always learn new things. One thing to look out for - when I took the classes (it was once a week for about 6 weeks) there were a lot of people there that were court ordered to be there. A lot of strange people, but at least it made me feel better about myself, lol.
But seriously, I'm considering taking more classes because, even if you only learn one thing you will apply, it will still make you that much better of a parent.
Well, it probably depends a lot on who is teaching them, what you are needing or wanting to learn, your child's age, and if you are having any specific problems with your child.
Need more info on this one...
Personally, I like to ask my Mommy friends that I respect for advice on specific problems, and/or read good books on the topic. If you have a new baby or are expecting, then ask an experienced Mama if you can shadow her for a couple of days and learn hands-on.
this is the course I did. It is the best one around and known as one of the few that work. It started in Australia but has had such success it is now in about 10 countries
keep your mind open and listen to others. our children don't come with instructions. we take classes to educate ourselves on our paying jobs %26amp; parenthood is no different.
very helpful
never attended one
I'm a mom of 5 and I can tell you, parenting classes are great. I've taken 4 in the past 7 years. And I used to be part of something called 'Parents as Teachers' where someone comes to your home and teaches you how to play fun educational games with your kids. I much preferred the at-home class. It's more interactive and personalized because the teacher can actually see your kids and how they are. Then you aren't just getting a text-book response on how to handle something.Parenting Classes Are they Helpful?
Parenting classes are helpful, even if you consider yourself a good parent. You can always learn new things. One thing to look out for - when I took the classes (it was once a week for about 6 weeks) there were a lot of people there that were court ordered to be there. A lot of strange people, but at least it made me feel better about myself, lol.
But seriously, I'm considering taking more classes because, even if you only learn one thing you will apply, it will still make you that much better of a parent.
Well, it probably depends a lot on who is teaching them, what you are needing or wanting to learn, your child's age, and if you are having any specific problems with your child.
Need more info on this one...
Personally, I like to ask my Mommy friends that I respect for advice on specific problems, and/or read good books on the topic. If you have a new baby or are expecting, then ask an experienced Mama if you can shadow her for a couple of days and learn hands-on.
this is the course I did. It is the best one around and known as one of the few that work. It started in Australia but has had such success it is now in about 10 countries
keep your mind open and listen to others. our children don't come with instructions. we take classes to educate ourselves on our paying jobs %26amp; parenthood is no different.
very helpful
never attended one
Views on teenage parenting? Good options only please?
What are peoples views on teenage parenting?me and my boyfriend are very much in love we both want a baby together, do you think we could cope now, or do you think we are to young?Views on teenage parenting? Good options only please?
get an education first and qualifications in your field of interest - and then some full time work experience - then you will be in a much better position to support a child. Also, make sure the relationship will hold together in the long run - which you don't know yet, no matter how you feel now.
Have the baby after you have a few good fun years together. In you qualify and you are interested, go to college together. After that, have some adventures - maybe live and work another country for a while. You might also consider putting some money aside for a house etc - all of which is difficult enough with entry level jobs, without the added expense of a child.
Babies take a lot of responsibility - feeding, diapers, crying all night, After that, you will have a fuss-pot little toddler who needs constant supervision - and all that is before he/she starts school. Children are also rewarding - but they have to be raised well.
It sounds like you are sexually active - I don't judge that - I like a good one myself. But take precautions, for now and a few years yet,Views on teenage parenting? Good options only please?
Okay lets look at this:
1st. Only asking for good opinions doesn't get you all sides of an issue.
2nd: How are You going to support this baby. Not your parents not your boyfriend You.
3rd: Why cant you just love your boyfriend without having a child. Get a puppy if you want something to take care of.
4th: I highly recommend college or trade school it is expensive to raise a child and hospital bills are forever rising it is important to have a good foundation.
5th: So what if you and your boyfriend split you will be on your own and could you emotionally and finical support a child to adulthood.
I am not against teen parents accidents happen. I don't feel it is right that teens are ';planning'; pregnancy without really planning. It is not just about the changes in your life it is about raising a human who needs to become a functional member of Society.
I wouldn't do it. Sure, you are ready for it now, but once you get into college or go to work you will want time for yourself and time to relax, but of which a child won't give you. Also, as a teenager you most likely don't have the money to raise a child on your own.
In my opinion, you and your boyfriend should at least get married before having a baby as well, for many reasons including most of societies view on it. Maybe it won't effect you now, but it could bother your child later.
I was 22 when I had my son %26amp; my husband %26amp; I weren't ready. I don't think 2 teenagers would cope very well. I mean you're both young %26amp; aren't used to dealing with the demands of parenting. Right now I'm sure you don't have to call people to babysit when you want to go out to dinner, have them cancel, you can't go. Getting a baby ready for an outing takes at least a good 1/2 hour until you get in a routine. Then there's the doctors visits, dentist visits, the bills, the diapers, the clothes, the shoes, and all other kinds of expenses. If you don't have insurance that's a whole other thing to have to figure out.
Then you have the situation I'm in. I am in college full-time, have 2 children ages 3 %26amp; 2 years, I come home after being in class all day, my husband has to go to sleep b/c he works nights, I don't see him, he works all the time, he doesn't see me I'm in school all the time. I get home at 6 p.m. if I'm lucky, start supper, feed the kids, give the baths, read them a story, put them to bed, which I'm done about 9 p.m. Then I have home-work to do before I start my day at 6 a.m. the next morning. I have to drive 70 miles one way to get to college, by the time all of my day is complete I am lucky to get to bed by midnight.
I am in no way trying to preach to you, but please go to college first %26amp; have a career so you can take care of this baby you want. Trust me you will feel guilty if you don't. I am just trying to save you some heart-ache in the future.
Like almost everyone in the world, I think that if you each love each other, you would wait until about 22 and then have a child. Your social life will never be the same with a child, and also, most people break up with the other because of all the stress, so if you have a child now, you will probably be a single mother at a dead end job living with a relative.
Just put into consideration of the baby and the happiness of he/she when it is born.
I'm sure you will hear this time and time again -- it might be a better idea to plan for a future and having a family together, instead of just jumping into it before you might be prepared.
My best advice is to weigh the odds.
Babies are a lot of responsibility -- sometimes they keep us up all night, night after night... they are new, little people, and it takes them time to adjust to the world. So, it's a lot of work and takes 24 hour a day, seven day a week dedication. There are doctor's appointments for immunizations and well baby check ups... there is spit up and diarrhea sometimes... sometimes babies don't feel well, and they tend to be fussy. You might want to ask yourself if you are prepared for this sort of lifestyle.
Parenting involves a lot less time socializing with friends, and going out doing whatever you want to do, as well. So, if you like to go to concerts, and do things other kids your age do, without restrictions, then take this into consideration.
Plus, being a couple and parents at the same time, is a big job in itself. You will deal with every day life problems as a couple and as parents. You and your guy won't always agree with things, so you will need to learn to accept each other's flaws and personal ideas. You will need to learn to compromise. It sounds easier than it is!
You might also consider the financial aspects of raising a child. It's always nice to have a good, steady, reliable income, and to save some money before starting a family. You will need to make sure your baby has a nice bed, sheets, clothing, diapers, blankets, and all of the necessary supplies a child needs when he comes into the world. This does take money, and planning.
I realize some people don't have money and don't plan, but i think that, those of us who have the option to plan for a child, are doing the right thing for the child's sake! ... and it doesn't hurt our own peace of mind, either.
So, decide if you want to be tied down to a child for the next 18 years, or if you want to be free to explore the world a little first. It's your choice.
all the best!
Oh dear - in another question you're claiming you're already pregnant at 15 and you're worried that your mum's smoking will harm the baby. In yet another question, you want to know if you can get a council house at 15, if you have a baby. If I were you, I'd concentrate on your school work !
My advice would be.. If you both in love to each other then why not wait for the right time to make baby? For good Parenting Advice and other Relationship go here.
http://www.parentingsuccesstips.com/
give it some time.
get an education first and qualifications in your field of interest - and then some full time work experience - then you will be in a much better position to support a child. Also, make sure the relationship will hold together in the long run - which you don't know yet, no matter how you feel now.
Have the baby after you have a few good fun years together. In you qualify and you are interested, go to college together. After that, have some adventures - maybe live and work another country for a while. You might also consider putting some money aside for a house etc - all of which is difficult enough with entry level jobs, without the added expense of a child.
Babies take a lot of responsibility - feeding, diapers, crying all night, After that, you will have a fuss-pot little toddler who needs constant supervision - and all that is before he/she starts school. Children are also rewarding - but they have to be raised well.
It sounds like you are sexually active - I don't judge that - I like a good one myself. But take precautions, for now and a few years yet,Views on teenage parenting? Good options only please?
Okay lets look at this:
1st. Only asking for good opinions doesn't get you all sides of an issue.
2nd: How are You going to support this baby. Not your parents not your boyfriend You.
3rd: Why cant you just love your boyfriend without having a child. Get a puppy if you want something to take care of.
4th: I highly recommend college or trade school it is expensive to raise a child and hospital bills are forever rising it is important to have a good foundation.
5th: So what if you and your boyfriend split you will be on your own and could you emotionally and finical support a child to adulthood.
I am not against teen parents accidents happen. I don't feel it is right that teens are ';planning'; pregnancy without really planning. It is not just about the changes in your life it is about raising a human who needs to become a functional member of Society.
I wouldn't do it. Sure, you are ready for it now, but once you get into college or go to work you will want time for yourself and time to relax, but of which a child won't give you. Also, as a teenager you most likely don't have the money to raise a child on your own.
In my opinion, you and your boyfriend should at least get married before having a baby as well, for many reasons including most of societies view on it. Maybe it won't effect you now, but it could bother your child later.
I was 22 when I had my son %26amp; my husband %26amp; I weren't ready. I don't think 2 teenagers would cope very well. I mean you're both young %26amp; aren't used to dealing with the demands of parenting. Right now I'm sure you don't have to call people to babysit when you want to go out to dinner, have them cancel, you can't go. Getting a baby ready for an outing takes at least a good 1/2 hour until you get in a routine. Then there's the doctors visits, dentist visits, the bills, the diapers, the clothes, the shoes, and all other kinds of expenses. If you don't have insurance that's a whole other thing to have to figure out.
Then you have the situation I'm in. I am in college full-time, have 2 children ages 3 %26amp; 2 years, I come home after being in class all day, my husband has to go to sleep b/c he works nights, I don't see him, he works all the time, he doesn't see me I'm in school all the time. I get home at 6 p.m. if I'm lucky, start supper, feed the kids, give the baths, read them a story, put them to bed, which I'm done about 9 p.m. Then I have home-work to do before I start my day at 6 a.m. the next morning. I have to drive 70 miles one way to get to college, by the time all of my day is complete I am lucky to get to bed by midnight.
I am in no way trying to preach to you, but please go to college first %26amp; have a career so you can take care of this baby you want. Trust me you will feel guilty if you don't. I am just trying to save you some heart-ache in the future.
Like almost everyone in the world, I think that if you each love each other, you would wait until about 22 and then have a child. Your social life will never be the same with a child, and also, most people break up with the other because of all the stress, so if you have a child now, you will probably be a single mother at a dead end job living with a relative.
Just put into consideration of the baby and the happiness of he/she when it is born.
I'm sure you will hear this time and time again -- it might be a better idea to plan for a future and having a family together, instead of just jumping into it before you might be prepared.
My best advice is to weigh the odds.
Babies are a lot of responsibility -- sometimes they keep us up all night, night after night... they are new, little people, and it takes them time to adjust to the world. So, it's a lot of work and takes 24 hour a day, seven day a week dedication. There are doctor's appointments for immunizations and well baby check ups... there is spit up and diarrhea sometimes... sometimes babies don't feel well, and they tend to be fussy. You might want to ask yourself if you are prepared for this sort of lifestyle.
Parenting involves a lot less time socializing with friends, and going out doing whatever you want to do, as well. So, if you like to go to concerts, and do things other kids your age do, without restrictions, then take this into consideration.
Plus, being a couple and parents at the same time, is a big job in itself. You will deal with every day life problems as a couple and as parents. You and your guy won't always agree with things, so you will need to learn to accept each other's flaws and personal ideas. You will need to learn to compromise. It sounds easier than it is!
You might also consider the financial aspects of raising a child. It's always nice to have a good, steady, reliable income, and to save some money before starting a family. You will need to make sure your baby has a nice bed, sheets, clothing, diapers, blankets, and all of the necessary supplies a child needs when he comes into the world. This does take money, and planning.
I realize some people don't have money and don't plan, but i think that, those of us who have the option to plan for a child, are doing the right thing for the child's sake! ... and it doesn't hurt our own peace of mind, either.
So, decide if you want to be tied down to a child for the next 18 years, or if you want to be free to explore the world a little first. It's your choice.
all the best!
Oh dear - in another question you're claiming you're already pregnant at 15 and you're worried that your mum's smoking will harm the baby. In yet another question, you want to know if you can get a council house at 15, if you have a baby. If I were you, I'd concentrate on your school work !
My advice would be.. If you both in love to each other then why not wait for the right time to make baby? For good Parenting Advice and other Relationship go here.
http://www.parentingsuccesstips.com/
give it some time.
Why are people so mean with their answers on parenting?
teen pregnancy and breastfeeding questions...wow, watch out!
drum rollllllllllllllllllllllllllWhy are people so mean with their answers on parenting?
Some people are idiots, and have a sarcastic comment for everything.
Some are just blunt people. They'll tell you what they think and don't care if it offends you.
Some are just easy going and tell you what they think.
The rest are just too nice, and don't want to offend anyone.Why are people so mean with their answers on parenting?
i know right! good lord i hate it when people are d*cks to other people who actually NEED help....
I think people tend to get very, very opionated when it comes to children. I myself have gotten a little nasty at times, I'm afraid. I don't get upset about teen pregnancy or breastfeeding questions...but anything about a child not being put first and treated as the precious angels they are really steams me. And then there are also the parents that think that they way they are raising/raised their children was the only way it should be done so they give their two cents worth.
I don't see with what's wrong @ breast feeding. I do understand that there might be some moral/political dilemma encountered with teen pregnancy but personally, I don't think it's anyone's business to tell off other people.
because people can hide behind a computer
I don't know why some people have problems! if they don't have anything nice to say...then they shouldn't say it at all.
I am rude in 2 situations:
1. If you are on public assistance. I need my whole paycheck for MY pregnancy/child; I am not responsible for your body or your child. If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em. Simple as that. If you don't like my criticism, don't have children you cannot afford.
2. When women whine and cry about ';not judging others';, and then go answer a question about abortion in the most nasty, judgmental way possible. Can you say hypocrite?
I know I breastfed all 4 of my kids with no problem but sometimes when I offer advise people give me thumbs down.
Parents ARE mean!! LOL I've noticed that.. so in return I try to be POSITIVE when I answer questions..
I mean ... I've asked my share of questions and when I look back I think ---wow what a dumb question .. LOL
But no question is dumb, except the one that isn't asked.. cause then you continue to mess up!
So please... mommies.. be nice!!
geez!
What's your question hun??
If it's about breasfeeding.. I couldn't help ya!
I tried it and I cried like I never cried before cause my daughter did not want me, love me or need me (at least that's how it felt at the time) and now I realize that she just wanted to eat FAST (like her dad) and a bottle did that for her. lol
I didn't even notice the ';teen-parenting'; part until I read the other replies..
Well do the best you can.. I felt like a teen when I had my daughter and I had her at 23.. I cried as they wheeled me into delivery.. when asked WHY I was crying -I had no contractions yet- I replied ';I'm not ready for any of this, how did this happen...';
Um.. at 23 and married.. I don't know WHY I was asking ';HOW'; LOL
It's the scariest thing at any age!
some people are just bitter inside and cant find anything nice to say..so their inside anger are protrayed out in answers..
drum rollllllllllllllllllllllllllWhy are people so mean with their answers on parenting?
Some people are idiots, and have a sarcastic comment for everything.
Some are just blunt people. They'll tell you what they think and don't care if it offends you.
Some are just easy going and tell you what they think.
The rest are just too nice, and don't want to offend anyone.Why are people so mean with their answers on parenting?
i know right! good lord i hate it when people are d*cks to other people who actually NEED help....
I think people tend to get very, very opionated when it comes to children. I myself have gotten a little nasty at times, I'm afraid. I don't get upset about teen pregnancy or breastfeeding questions...but anything about a child not being put first and treated as the precious angels they are really steams me. And then there are also the parents that think that they way they are raising/raised their children was the only way it should be done so they give their two cents worth.
I don't see with what's wrong @ breast feeding. I do understand that there might be some moral/political dilemma encountered with teen pregnancy but personally, I don't think it's anyone's business to tell off other people.
because people can hide behind a computer
I don't know why some people have problems! if they don't have anything nice to say...then they shouldn't say it at all.
I am rude in 2 situations:
1. If you are on public assistance. I need my whole paycheck for MY pregnancy/child; I am not responsible for your body or your child. If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em. Simple as that. If you don't like my criticism, don't have children you cannot afford.
2. When women whine and cry about ';not judging others';, and then go answer a question about abortion in the most nasty, judgmental way possible. Can you say hypocrite?
I know I breastfed all 4 of my kids with no problem but sometimes when I offer advise people give me thumbs down.
Parents ARE mean!! LOL I've noticed that.. so in return I try to be POSITIVE when I answer questions..
I mean ... I've asked my share of questions and when I look back I think ---wow what a dumb question .. LOL
But no question is dumb, except the one that isn't asked.. cause then you continue to mess up!
So please... mommies.. be nice!!
geez!
What's your question hun??
If it's about breasfeeding.. I couldn't help ya!
I tried it and I cried like I never cried before cause my daughter did not want me, love me or need me (at least that's how it felt at the time) and now I realize that she just wanted to eat FAST (like her dad) and a bottle did that for her. lol
I didn't even notice the ';teen-parenting'; part until I read the other replies..
Well do the best you can.. I felt like a teen when I had my daughter and I had her at 23.. I cried as they wheeled me into delivery.. when asked WHY I was crying -I had no contractions yet- I replied ';I'm not ready for any of this, how did this happen...';
Um.. at 23 and married.. I don't know WHY I was asking ';HOW'; LOL
It's the scariest thing at any age!
some people are just bitter inside and cant find anything nice to say..so their inside anger are protrayed out in answers..
When does parenting get easier? My son is 18. The older he gets the more difficult.?
He battles us on every front. We are bending over backwards to help him ease into adulthood.When does parenting get easier? My son is 18. The older he gets the more difficult.?
The day it will be easier is the day they put you 6 ft. under - lol, sorry I have a 20 yr old son and 34 yr old daughterWhen does parenting get easier? My son is 18. The older he gets the more difficult.?
I don't know when it gets easier, but I do know it's beyond 22!
Why should parenting get easier?
Parenting has its ups and downs,so it generally evens out.On the whole parenting should be fun.
From your questions it is obvious that you are having problems with your son.
There seems a lack of communication, and understanding, on both sides.
Many times it helps to change your way of thinking, and adopt a different approach.
Keeping calm, not getting angry, and not forcing him to accept your way of thinking and doing things, helps.
Listen to what he has to say,understand his point of view. For any problem, the more the number of view points the better.
Quite often this alone will defuse the situation.
Agree with him when his views are reasonable and discuss why you think so. When unreasonable, again discuss, why you think so, be firm in your decision, without getting angry ( very important ).
Channels of communication must be kept open.
There is a lot we learn from children, and a lot that children learn from us.
Enjoy your adolescent
Good luck
... and everytime you bend, he tries to get more.
Solution. Make rules and stick by them.
Those should be adult rules and reasonable. Not meant to control his behaviour, but meant to keep the household livable. That's what 'reasonable' means.
If he remains defiant, you should treat him like an adult: He can leave.
Find him a cheap apartment, pay the first three months of rent and help (=make) him move. Take his key. He no longer lives in your house.
He wants an adult life, take his own decisions.
The best idea is to let him do that, but draw the line where it affects your life.
18 years old, still lives at home, ok......BUT, if he's going to be difficult to you, make it less easy for him, don't do his laundry, cook his meals, clean his room, bathroom, etc.....Make him be a man...... If you treat him like a baby he will keep acting like one...... I know as a mother you want to be there for them, but at the same time you can do both, just make him realize what you do. He might change his tune......!! Good Luck, but you can do it, otherwise he will not be leaving the nest anytime soon......
Yup-get used to it. I went through it 3 times. But since he is 18 now, you really need to let him start making his own decisions-that is as long as he is either in school full time or working full time and not getting into real trouble.
He is an adult now.
My grandparents would tell you that it never gets easier.
Then again, I have a very dysfunctional family, in which the some of the adult (read: 40-50 year old) children rely on the parents for nearly everything.
*Sigh*
That's just teenagers. It's just a stage, most boys at that age will start to not need their parents as much, and they think they are ready and set for life. It's just a stage don't worry it's not going to last forever.
Well, if he is 18yo then he needs to be out on his own. I mean if he's at university or somethin then bein still at home is ok. But if he gets difficult then he needs booted out.
But regardless, u shouldn't be bendin over backwards to ease him inot adulthood. He should be just plain forced to accept adulthood. U should be tellin him that since he is 18yo he is gonna help with expenses, do extra work at home, and be more responsible with less supervision. And if he don't wanna go along with it, then his bum goes out the door.
Sounds hardass but thats how kids learn. Bein soft on him only lets him think life is gonna treat him all nice and stuff. It just don't work that way. He's gotta learn to struggle to make it just like everyone else does.
The day it will be easier is the day they put you 6 ft. under - lol, sorry I have a 20 yr old son and 34 yr old daughterWhen does parenting get easier? My son is 18. The older he gets the more difficult.?
I don't know when it gets easier, but I do know it's beyond 22!
Why should parenting get easier?
Parenting has its ups and downs,so it generally evens out.On the whole parenting should be fun.
From your questions it is obvious that you are having problems with your son.
There seems a lack of communication, and understanding, on both sides.
Many times it helps to change your way of thinking, and adopt a different approach.
Keeping calm, not getting angry, and not forcing him to accept your way of thinking and doing things, helps.
Listen to what he has to say,understand his point of view. For any problem, the more the number of view points the better.
Quite often this alone will defuse the situation.
Agree with him when his views are reasonable and discuss why you think so. When unreasonable, again discuss, why you think so, be firm in your decision, without getting angry ( very important ).
Channels of communication must be kept open.
There is a lot we learn from children, and a lot that children learn from us.
Enjoy your adolescent
Good luck
... and everytime you bend, he tries to get more.
Solution. Make rules and stick by them.
Those should be adult rules and reasonable. Not meant to control his behaviour, but meant to keep the household livable. That's what 'reasonable' means.
If he remains defiant, you should treat him like an adult: He can leave.
Find him a cheap apartment, pay the first three months of rent and help (=make) him move. Take his key. He no longer lives in your house.
He wants an adult life, take his own decisions.
The best idea is to let him do that, but draw the line where it affects your life.
18 years old, still lives at home, ok......BUT, if he's going to be difficult to you, make it less easy for him, don't do his laundry, cook his meals, clean his room, bathroom, etc.....Make him be a man...... If you treat him like a baby he will keep acting like one...... I know as a mother you want to be there for them, but at the same time you can do both, just make him realize what you do. He might change his tune......!! Good Luck, but you can do it, otherwise he will not be leaving the nest anytime soon......
Yup-get used to it. I went through it 3 times. But since he is 18 now, you really need to let him start making his own decisions-that is as long as he is either in school full time or working full time and not getting into real trouble.
He is an adult now.
My grandparents would tell you that it never gets easier.
Then again, I have a very dysfunctional family, in which the some of the adult (read: 40-50 year old) children rely on the parents for nearly everything.
*Sigh*
That's just teenagers. It's just a stage, most boys at that age will start to not need their parents as much, and they think they are ready and set for life. It's just a stage don't worry it's not going to last forever.
Well, if he is 18yo then he needs to be out on his own. I mean if he's at university or somethin then bein still at home is ok. But if he gets difficult then he needs booted out.
But regardless, u shouldn't be bendin over backwards to ease him inot adulthood. He should be just plain forced to accept adulthood. U should be tellin him that since he is 18yo he is gonna help with expenses, do extra work at home, and be more responsible with less supervision. And if he don't wanna go along with it, then his bum goes out the door.
Sounds hardass but thats how kids learn. Bein soft on him only lets him think life is gonna treat him all nice and stuff. It just don't work that way. He's gotta learn to struggle to make it just like everyone else does.
What is the difference b/n parenting in The USA and Japan?
I don't know anything about the parenting styles of the USA, except for what I have read online at parenting websites, but I do know that there are some very obvious differences between generally Western style parenting and Japanese parenting.
1.) Co-sleeping. For most Japanese parents that I have spoken to, the concept of putting a pre-schooler in their own bed, and even in their own room is pretty disturbing. I have an American friend who is married to a Japanese woman, and they have a one-year old boy. The co-sleeping matter is a big source of contention between them.
2.) Working Moms. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of working Japanese mothers, but there is also a LOT of subtle pressure to quit your job and be a stay at home mom. I'm not sure about other professions, but teachers get sankyu (maternity leave: 8weeks) and ikukyu (child raising leave: about 1 year) before they have to return to work. As a assistant teacher I get no ikukyu, so my daughter was in nursery school from 2 months old, and almost all of the other kids were at least a year older than her.
Those are the two major issues I can think of off the top of my head, but if you have any other specific issues you want to explore, I can always ask my co-workers about their opinions for you. Just drop me an e-mail.
Edit: Just to comment on what Rabbityama said about disciplining of children. The reason that I have been told that Japanese kids are allowed to run rampant in public is because disciplining them in public would 'create a scene'. Instead the kids are told off once they get home. I've actually seen this in action when I was watching some students while there were parent-teacher conferences going on. One mother came to pick up her kid and you could see from her expression that she was fuming. The kid asked, ';So?'; and her only reply was ';Not here.';What is the difference b/n parenting in The USA and Japan?
I can think of a couple of other differences:
1) By the time I was a teenager (in Canada, pretty much the same as the USA, I think), I was doing my own laundry, cooking my own food whenever I wasn't going to be eating at the same time as my parents, sharing in the housework, etc. In Japan, mothers usually do all this stuff for their children -- even when the children are over 30 and still living at home (which is common)! The children are supposed to be focussed on their studies / work. Even working mothers are expected to do a lot of this stuff, although some of it may also be passed on to the grandparents (see below). Yeah, theoretically it could be a stay-at-home father, but I haven't encountered one yet.
2) Grandparents and other non-immediate family members take a much greater role in parenting in Japan. Daycare still isn't too common and paid babysitting is virtually unheard of.
In some ways, Japanese parents also seem really lax (for example, you wouldn't believe how many parents you see carrying/walking around with small children well after midnight in Japan, or how many kindergarten-aged children ride the train to %26amp; from school alone). But Western parents often seem pretty negligent in other ways. I guess that depends mainly on individual parenting style.What is the difference b/n parenting in The USA and Japan?
I think American parents teach their children how to properly behave faster than Japanese parents. I've heard it has something to do with the ';culture of cute'; in Japan (a ';who would want to discipline an adorable little child?'; sort of attitude). Whatever the reason, Japanese children get away with being really obnoxious more often than a child in America would. It's quite noticeable in restaurants. I won't say that someones kid has ruined my ';dining experience';, but numerous times it happens when a kid is running around, being noisy, peeping in on other guests, dumping food/beverages on the floor, etc. and the parents don't do anything. NOBODY does much of anything. They usually pretend not to notice for as long as they possibly can... These things can really bother me.
Yes, when it comes to discipline, it seems that it is more often lacking in Japan.
I should note that this behavior is by no means RAMPANT, but it is significantly more common in Japan than in America. There are plenty of Japanese parents who DO keep their children under control.
On the other hand, I think Japanese kids often remain innocent longer, and the lack of discipline could possibly contribute to that. Discipline is an early form of socialization; the earliest preparations for behaving as a proper member of society (aka: an adult). The ';cute'; factor can keep them innocent longer, as well, because they are treated more delicately.
1.) Co-sleeping. For most Japanese parents that I have spoken to, the concept of putting a pre-schooler in their own bed, and even in their own room is pretty disturbing. I have an American friend who is married to a Japanese woman, and they have a one-year old boy. The co-sleeping matter is a big source of contention between them.
2.) Working Moms. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of working Japanese mothers, but there is also a LOT of subtle pressure to quit your job and be a stay at home mom. I'm not sure about other professions, but teachers get sankyu (maternity leave: 8weeks) and ikukyu (child raising leave: about 1 year) before they have to return to work. As a assistant teacher I get no ikukyu, so my daughter was in nursery school from 2 months old, and almost all of the other kids were at least a year older than her.
Those are the two major issues I can think of off the top of my head, but if you have any other specific issues you want to explore, I can always ask my co-workers about their opinions for you. Just drop me an e-mail.
Edit: Just to comment on what Rabbityama said about disciplining of children. The reason that I have been told that Japanese kids are allowed to run rampant in public is because disciplining them in public would 'create a scene'. Instead the kids are told off once they get home. I've actually seen this in action when I was watching some students while there were parent-teacher conferences going on. One mother came to pick up her kid and you could see from her expression that she was fuming. The kid asked, ';So?'; and her only reply was ';Not here.';What is the difference b/n parenting in The USA and Japan?
I can think of a couple of other differences:
1) By the time I was a teenager (in Canada, pretty much the same as the USA, I think), I was doing my own laundry, cooking my own food whenever I wasn't going to be eating at the same time as my parents, sharing in the housework, etc. In Japan, mothers usually do all this stuff for their children -- even when the children are over 30 and still living at home (which is common)! The children are supposed to be focussed on their studies / work. Even working mothers are expected to do a lot of this stuff, although some of it may also be passed on to the grandparents (see below). Yeah, theoretically it could be a stay-at-home father, but I haven't encountered one yet.
2) Grandparents and other non-immediate family members take a much greater role in parenting in Japan. Daycare still isn't too common and paid babysitting is virtually unheard of.
In some ways, Japanese parents also seem really lax (for example, you wouldn't believe how many parents you see carrying/walking around with small children well after midnight in Japan, or how many kindergarten-aged children ride the train to %26amp; from school alone). But Western parents often seem pretty negligent in other ways. I guess that depends mainly on individual parenting style.What is the difference b/n parenting in The USA and Japan?
I think American parents teach their children how to properly behave faster than Japanese parents. I've heard it has something to do with the ';culture of cute'; in Japan (a ';who would want to discipline an adorable little child?'; sort of attitude). Whatever the reason, Japanese children get away with being really obnoxious more often than a child in America would. It's quite noticeable in restaurants. I won't say that someones kid has ruined my ';dining experience';, but numerous times it happens when a kid is running around, being noisy, peeping in on other guests, dumping food/beverages on the floor, etc. and the parents don't do anything. NOBODY does much of anything. They usually pretend not to notice for as long as they possibly can... These things can really bother me.
Yes, when it comes to discipline, it seems that it is more often lacking in Japan.
I should note that this behavior is by no means RAMPANT, but it is significantly more common in Japan than in America. There are plenty of Japanese parents who DO keep their children under control.
On the other hand, I think Japanese kids often remain innocent longer, and the lack of discipline could possibly contribute to that. Discipline is an early form of socialization; the earliest preparations for behaving as a proper member of society (aka: an adult). The ';cute'; factor can keep them innocent longer, as well, because they are treated more delicately.
Is parenting or teaching a simple matter?
No indeed! Both are difficult and costly to the one doing the parenting/teaching. I have enormous respect for good parents and true teachers. By true teachers I mean those who have a real vocation for teaching, a real gift. I know 2 ';real'; teachers and they are amazing people who can make a good, informative lesson out of almost nothing.
Parents are doing an impossible job in an impossible world, and those who do a good job are to be admired.Is parenting or teaching a simple matter?
heyyy,
what does it mean...teachers are like parents...
if big classes there is a matter ......but this is small classes.Its to easy.Simple.
Hope this helps u alotIs parenting or teaching a simple matter?
OMG No!
NO !!!!!!!!!
A big fat NO. You can't just take it easy for the future of your kids lies on your hands on how you deal with them. If you are a parent you are forever a teacher. If you are a teacher you are forever the second to mold a person.
Neither is simple. You have to learn how to do each.
Teaching is what a parent does from the day their children are born.
Children do not come with instruction booklets, but teaching past basic parenting is simple, and natural.
Both are a learned skill, and a parent has many years of continual on the job training.
Parents who decide to teach, ';home school'; simply look at teaching as adding academics to their daily routine as the children are ready to handle these.
Is it simple; no, worth it, yes absolutely.
We are all a work in progress :D
Not if you do it right. Though my best advice for any new parent is to go with your gut instinct when it comes to what is right for your child.
You cannot be serious.......
depends on the adult...being a teacher and mum myself I..d SAY the matter is never finished and should pay for both jobs.....
NO,SIR it is not!!!estee lauder
Parents are doing an impossible job in an impossible world, and those who do a good job are to be admired.Is parenting or teaching a simple matter?
heyyy,
what does it mean...teachers are like parents...
if big classes there is a matter ......but this is small classes.Its to easy.Simple.
Hope this helps u alotIs parenting or teaching a simple matter?
OMG No!
NO !!!!!!!!!
A big fat NO. You can't just take it easy for the future of your kids lies on your hands on how you deal with them. If you are a parent you are forever a teacher. If you are a teacher you are forever the second to mold a person.
Neither is simple. You have to learn how to do each.
Teaching is what a parent does from the day their children are born.
Children do not come with instruction booklets, but teaching past basic parenting is simple, and natural.
Both are a learned skill, and a parent has many years of continual on the job training.
Parents who decide to teach, ';home school'; simply look at teaching as adding academics to their daily routine as the children are ready to handle these.
Is it simple; no, worth it, yes absolutely.
We are all a work in progress :D
Not if you do it right. Though my best advice for any new parent is to go with your gut instinct when it comes to what is right for your child.
You cannot be serious.......
depends on the adult...being a teacher and mum myself I..d SAY the matter is never finished and should pay for both jobs.....
NO,SIR it is not!!!
Any tips on single parenting anybody? I am about to be a single mom of 2 girls ages 3 and 1.5?
Here's a few suggestions:
1. Find reliable child care so you can work, or go back to school, if you need a better job.
2. Don't start bringing every man you date into your home. I would suggest dating no less than 6 months before you introduce 'new guy' to your children. Not every relationship you'll start is going to end up well. It will confuse your daughters and may end up giving them the impression that they NEED a man in their lives... even if the relationship is not good. Always make sure they feel you love them over and above whomever else you might meet.
3. Try not to alienate them from their father... unless you have solid evidence that they are unsafe with him. That includes saying negative things about him. Make sure you don't let your own anger with him (for whatever reason) become your daughter's issues.
4. Let them be a part of both your own, and your ex's families.
5. Always keep the lines of commuication opened for them. Any subject. Any time.
6. Other than work/school, spend as much time with them as possible. Studies have actually shown that just being with them, as opposed to 'doing things' with them promotes emotional health.
7. Don't fall into the 'friend' trap. Children need a parent to set boundaries. Although they won't always seem to appreciate it, in the long run it helps them to feel safe, loved, and grow up to be emotionallly healthy adults. Be a loving parent. They'll find 'friends' at school.Any tips on single parenting anybody? I am about to be a single mom of 2 girls ages 3 and 1.5?
Just be the best mommy you can be to your little girls. The way I see it is you have the best of both worlds, you get to be mommy and daddy and if you do it right your girls will adore you. Im not saying it will be easy, but in my opinion, even when the father is around it still isn't always easy...men tend to be not very helpful when it comes to kids...not all men, but most of the time you should count on doing everything yourself.Any tips on single parenting anybody? I am about to be a single mom of 2 girls ages 3 and 1.5?
Pray. Daily and often. Ask for guidance and strength.
Family is important if they are supportive and not negative tearing you down and your decisions. Find a wise uncle or aunt and get their advice. Be mindful of predatory males who will use this situation to get you to do stupid stuff so you will ';hang on'; to them, trust me they are not worth it. The right man will come along one day and will see what kind of mother you are.
Above all give your girls the life that will allow them to see a loving mother making good choices as an example to live by when they get older.
.
always say ';i love you'; and lots of kisses. my kids were only a little older then yours when i became a single mom. play with them and read to them. never say bad things about their dad. always smile. but let them know when you are sad and they will understand.
i wish you the best of luck. when families offer to watch them for you say ';YES';. you also need time for yourself.
Yeah -- When family, or friends, offer help, don't be too proud to accept. It's hard to do it all as a single person, and help is always a good thing...
And also the obvious, don't bring every man you meet around your children, date for a few months before doing the introduction...
no, but i wish you luck. i have nothing but respect for single mothers!
1. Find reliable child care so you can work, or go back to school, if you need a better job.
2. Don't start bringing every man you date into your home. I would suggest dating no less than 6 months before you introduce 'new guy' to your children. Not every relationship you'll start is going to end up well. It will confuse your daughters and may end up giving them the impression that they NEED a man in their lives... even if the relationship is not good. Always make sure they feel you love them over and above whomever else you might meet.
3. Try not to alienate them from their father... unless you have solid evidence that they are unsafe with him. That includes saying negative things about him. Make sure you don't let your own anger with him (for whatever reason) become your daughter's issues.
4. Let them be a part of both your own, and your ex's families.
5. Always keep the lines of commuication opened for them. Any subject. Any time.
6. Other than work/school, spend as much time with them as possible. Studies have actually shown that just being with them, as opposed to 'doing things' with them promotes emotional health.
7. Don't fall into the 'friend' trap. Children need a parent to set boundaries. Although they won't always seem to appreciate it, in the long run it helps them to feel safe, loved, and grow up to be emotionallly healthy adults. Be a loving parent. They'll find 'friends' at school.Any tips on single parenting anybody? I am about to be a single mom of 2 girls ages 3 and 1.5?
Just be the best mommy you can be to your little girls. The way I see it is you have the best of both worlds, you get to be mommy and daddy and if you do it right your girls will adore you. Im not saying it will be easy, but in my opinion, even when the father is around it still isn't always easy...men tend to be not very helpful when it comes to kids...not all men, but most of the time you should count on doing everything yourself.Any tips on single parenting anybody? I am about to be a single mom of 2 girls ages 3 and 1.5?
Pray. Daily and often. Ask for guidance and strength.
Family is important if they are supportive and not negative tearing you down and your decisions. Find a wise uncle or aunt and get their advice. Be mindful of predatory males who will use this situation to get you to do stupid stuff so you will ';hang on'; to them, trust me they are not worth it. The right man will come along one day and will see what kind of mother you are.
Above all give your girls the life that will allow them to see a loving mother making good choices as an example to live by when they get older.
.
always say ';i love you'; and lots of kisses. my kids were only a little older then yours when i became a single mom. play with them and read to them. never say bad things about their dad. always smile. but let them know when you are sad and they will understand.
i wish you the best of luck. when families offer to watch them for you say ';YES';. you also need time for yourself.
Yeah -- When family, or friends, offer help, don't be too proud to accept. It's hard to do it all as a single person, and help is always a good thing...
And also the obvious, don't bring every man you meet around your children, date for a few months before doing the introduction...
no, but i wish you luck. i have nothing but respect for single mothers!
Im in Langley Bc Does anyone know of any good lamaze/pregnancy/parenting classes?
My friend recommend me with this parenting class she used to attend, I am one of their student now and I really do appreciate there teachings and I learn a lot. You can check out there services in this link:
Hope to see you there.
Hope to see you there.
What are your main goals in parenting/education of kids?
Tell me which of the following do you consider to be most important (you can name more than one) and are there any of these that are not among your goals? Tell me by which means and methods do you try to achieve those goals that you consider to be important? Also tell me where you live, if you are American or of other nationality and what is your religion, if you believe in one.
1) obediance to parents
2) faith in God/piety
3) success in school/career
4) happiness/contentment of your child
5) intelligence/good knowledge
6) good manners
7) ability to critical thinking/rationality
8) sense of responsibility
9) tolerance
10) respect for others
11) belief in equality of different races/ men and women/ people of different
believes
12) ability to solve conflicts in peaceful way
13) trust and understanding between parents and children
If there is anything I forgot, tell me.What are your main goals in parenting/education of kids?
To be happy and confident in themselves and with life must be top of the list! That requires positive reinforcement parenting!What are your main goals in parenting/education of kids?
My wife and I discuss this alot. We want our son to grow up with a love for God, tolerance of other people, happiness, intelligence, and good manners. We read a book called The Blessing. It's a little dated, but it's basically about raising children to be independent adults by the age of 18. It kind of makes you think about where they should be at 10, where they should be 15 and so on. It's Biblically based because ancient Jews used to give their children the Blessing when they were ready to be adults. There has to be discipline in a loving way. I feel today's kids are being raised to believe that their own happiness is more important than other people's. When I was young, the kids weren't treated with the same rights as adults. We didn't always (or often) get our way, because our parents knew what was best and exercised their wisdom on us.
1) obediance to parents
2) faith in God/piety
3) success in school/career
4) happiness/contentment of your child
5) intelligence/good knowledge
6) good manners
7) ability to critical thinking/rationality
8) sense of responsibility
9) tolerance
10) respect for others
11) belief in equality of different races/ men and women/ people of different
believes
12) ability to solve conflicts in peaceful way
13) trust and understanding between parents and children
If there is anything I forgot, tell me.What are your main goals in parenting/education of kids?
To be happy and confident in themselves and with life must be top of the list! That requires positive reinforcement parenting!What are your main goals in parenting/education of kids?
My wife and I discuss this alot. We want our son to grow up with a love for God, tolerance of other people, happiness, intelligence, and good manners. We read a book called The Blessing. It's a little dated, but it's basically about raising children to be independent adults by the age of 18. It kind of makes you think about where they should be at 10, where they should be 15 and so on. It's Biblically based because ancient Jews used to give their children the Blessing when they were ready to be adults. There has to be discipline in a loving way. I feel today's kids are being raised to believe that their own happiness is more important than other people's. When I was young, the kids weren't treated with the same rights as adults. We didn't always (or often) get our way, because our parents knew what was best and exercised their wisdom on us.
What is your BEST parenting skill?
This is just a free-for-all, a chance to share your greatest success, your favorite tip, your shining moment. We can all stand to learn how to do something better :)What is your BEST parenting skill?
Lots of communicationWhat is your BEST parenting skill?
Unconditional Love.
I love my children no matter what.
I always tried to remember what it was like to be their age and be as understanding and reasonable as a parent could be.
My patience. When my daughter has a tantrum, I don't fly off the handle, even though I've wanted to many times.
Try to be their friend, I did not say their best friend, but try to always want the best for them in everything. Know that their life at school is not a bed of roses, whether they express that to you or not, be there to listen and give lots of hugs and smiles, always kiss them good night and try hard to not yell a lot at them
My son knows he's able to talk to me about anything. I just hope our honest relationship lasts through his teen years.
ive learned that if you simply spank your chilren when thy do bad, youll have a great kid, a opposed to not spankin them and when theyre older, youll either have to beat them or theyll walk all over you.
As a single mother of a 10yr old daughter and a 15yr old son.....I'd have to say my best parenting skill is to talk with my children about anything and everything and I am willing to stop what I am doing at the moment, look them in the eye and listen to them.
A Big Paddle lol.
Being the boss! Just kidding, LOL!
I believe that the best thing that I have done for my daughter so far is paying as much attention to her as possible. This includes answering all of her questions, watching her do something that she wants me to see, showing her how to do things the right way instead of telling her, and always knowing what she was in to at that moment.
I think that my daughter is as smart as she is today because of this. I wanted her to know that I was always there and available if she needed anything, and I was always interested in what she was doing. She still asks questions about everything and I am honest with her.(as honest as I can be at 5)
As parents we have all done things that we regret or wish we had done differently, but this is one thing that I feel is very important to the developement of any child. I am proud of the fact that she knows that I am always there to help her through whatever, and that I love her, no matter what. Whatever I have going on can be put on hold for just a few minutes to let her know that she is special and I care about her and whatever is important to her.
My ability to be ';the bad guy';. My wife is the good cop and I am the bad cop. I figure that one of us has to be the hard a@# so i elected myself to be it.
I feel that my best parenting skill would be always being there for my child no matter what. If it is a bad day or good. Sometimes taking a ride just the two of us to talk or sitting at the table to carry on a conversation and not in front of the TV all the time. When it's silent and they don't have other things to distract there mind they will open up to you if you just listen to them. Always Be there to listen to them be concerned about what they say to you because when they are little they look up to us and learn by example. Always teach them manners and how to respect others.
Be open,honest, and let them know HOW THE BEAR SHITS IN THE WOODS.Be sweet but firm.Just let them know THE RULES.
Unconditional love; even in the face of disobedience and great disappointment.
We need to convey to our children that while we may not uphold them in wrong doing, they always have our undying love and support, no matter what they do or don't do.
If everyone knew they were guaranteed this one sure thing, personal growth and redemption would not be so difficult for so many people when they stray from the right path in life.
Love covers a multitude of sins! God is love. If he can forgive me, his child, anything; so much more should I be able to forgive the child that he gave life through me.
I just don't understand people who withold love or permanently disown their children for any reason.
Mine was always sleeping. When I was sleeping, I could not possibly say or do anything that would screw up my child's psyche.
my shining moment is when I joined yahoo answers
am ...am...I..
tears in my eyes :(
Listening to my son, and doing all I can for him, whenever I can.
Spend time with them when they are children.
Give time to them when they are teenagers.
Enjoy their friendship when they are adults.
Two really, communication and leading by example.
My daughter is adopted, from another culture. She is the happiest child ever. But it was not always the roses . The best parenting skills I would say I practiced are: honesty, patience, positive motivation, constantly maintaining her self-esteem.
My best parenting skill I think is I get in the floor with my daughter and play the games she wants to play. Or when she wants to be princess I get to be queen. She tells me I have to be a nice queen not the mommy queen.
Lots of communicationWhat is your BEST parenting skill?
Unconditional Love.
I love my children no matter what.
I always tried to remember what it was like to be their age and be as understanding and reasonable as a parent could be.
My patience. When my daughter has a tantrum, I don't fly off the handle, even though I've wanted to many times.
Try to be their friend, I did not say their best friend, but try to always want the best for them in everything. Know that their life at school is not a bed of roses, whether they express that to you or not, be there to listen and give lots of hugs and smiles, always kiss them good night and try hard to not yell a lot at them
My son knows he's able to talk to me about anything. I just hope our honest relationship lasts through his teen years.
ive learned that if you simply spank your chilren when thy do bad, youll have a great kid, a opposed to not spankin them and when theyre older, youll either have to beat them or theyll walk all over you.
As a single mother of a 10yr old daughter and a 15yr old son.....I'd have to say my best parenting skill is to talk with my children about anything and everything and I am willing to stop what I am doing at the moment, look them in the eye and listen to them.
A Big Paddle lol.
Being the boss! Just kidding, LOL!
I believe that the best thing that I have done for my daughter so far is paying as much attention to her as possible. This includes answering all of her questions, watching her do something that she wants me to see, showing her how to do things the right way instead of telling her, and always knowing what she was in to at that moment.
I think that my daughter is as smart as she is today because of this. I wanted her to know that I was always there and available if she needed anything, and I was always interested in what she was doing. She still asks questions about everything and I am honest with her.(as honest as I can be at 5)
As parents we have all done things that we regret or wish we had done differently, but this is one thing that I feel is very important to the developement of any child. I am proud of the fact that she knows that I am always there to help her through whatever, and that I love her, no matter what. Whatever I have going on can be put on hold for just a few minutes to let her know that she is special and I care about her and whatever is important to her.
My ability to be ';the bad guy';. My wife is the good cop and I am the bad cop. I figure that one of us has to be the hard a@# so i elected myself to be it.
I feel that my best parenting skill would be always being there for my child no matter what. If it is a bad day or good. Sometimes taking a ride just the two of us to talk or sitting at the table to carry on a conversation and not in front of the TV all the time. When it's silent and they don't have other things to distract there mind they will open up to you if you just listen to them. Always Be there to listen to them be concerned about what they say to you because when they are little they look up to us and learn by example. Always teach them manners and how to respect others.
Be open,honest, and let them know HOW THE BEAR SHITS IN THE WOODS.Be sweet but firm.Just let them know THE RULES.
Unconditional love; even in the face of disobedience and great disappointment.
We need to convey to our children that while we may not uphold them in wrong doing, they always have our undying love and support, no matter what they do or don't do.
If everyone knew they were guaranteed this one sure thing, personal growth and redemption would not be so difficult for so many people when they stray from the right path in life.
Love covers a multitude of sins! God is love. If he can forgive me, his child, anything; so much more should I be able to forgive the child that he gave life through me.
I just don't understand people who withold love or permanently disown their children for any reason.
Mine was always sleeping. When I was sleeping, I could not possibly say or do anything that would screw up my child's psyche.
my shining moment is when I joined yahoo answers
am ...am...I..
tears in my eyes :(
Listening to my son, and doing all I can for him, whenever I can.
Spend time with them when they are children.
Give time to them when they are teenagers.
Enjoy their friendship when they are adults.
Two really, communication and leading by example.
My daughter is adopted, from another culture. She is the happiest child ever. But it was not always the roses . The best parenting skills I would say I practiced are: honesty, patience, positive motivation, constantly maintaining her self-esteem.
My best parenting skill I think is I get in the floor with my daughter and play the games she wants to play. Or when she wants to be princess I get to be queen. She tells me I have to be a nice queen not the mommy queen.
Ladies! Can you enumerate atleast four styles of parenting?
1. INDIFFERENT PARENTING
2.AUTHORITATIVE PARENTING
3.INDULGENT PARENTING
4.AOTHOITARIAN PARENTINGLadies! Can you enumerate atleast four styles of parenting?
authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, neglectful
2.AUTHORITATIVE PARENTING
3.INDULGENT PARENTING
4.AOTHOITARIAN PARENTINGLadies! Can you enumerate atleast four styles of parenting?
authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, neglectful
Parenting question for a class help?
children do not need to learn to control their own behavior to feel worthwhile? true or false
plz help!Parenting question for a class help?
False.
When children learn to control their own behaviour, it gives them a sense of accomplishment and that makes them feel worthy.Parenting question for a class help?
Yes, they do. You are doing them a disservice by allowing them to be monsters.
In high school, I was pissed because I got grounded for a C. I told my friend, who got all D's and she said ';You're lucky they even care';.
I had never thought of it that way before. Poor girl. She didn't feel worthwhile because her parents never made her control her behavior.
falseestee lauder
plz help!Parenting question for a class help?
False.
When children learn to control their own behaviour, it gives them a sense of accomplishment and that makes them feel worthy.Parenting question for a class help?
Yes, they do. You are doing them a disservice by allowing them to be monsters.
In high school, I was pissed because I got grounded for a C. I told my friend, who got all D's and she said ';You're lucky they even care';.
I had never thought of it that way before. Poor girl. She didn't feel worthwhile because her parents never made her control her behavior.
false
Which is more important for parenting: maturity or age?
maturity, I would rather see a mature 17yo with a baby that is loved and taken care of then see a 26 yo with a baby who is out causing trouble and raising hell, as opposed to respecting her baby. I was 24 when I had my daughter, and I felt ready, a friend of mine had one the same year, and completely puts off her responcibilities to her child to go out and 'live her life', she says a baby is going to tie her down, and she doesn't want that. Mature women get my vote all the way.Which is more important for parenting: maturity or age?
They are both equally important. But I would rather have a 20 year old mature parent than a 25 year old immature parent.Which is more important for parenting: maturity or age?
Maturity.
Maturity! I know lots of 30+ year old women who are terrible parents. But be reasonable, I don't care how mature an 18 year old thinks she is, she is too young to be having babies... and that comes from someone who had babies at 19. Now don't get me wrong, I'm a wonderful mom, and there are lots of awesome young moms out there, but I'm mature enough to admit that I was too you ng to have kids. I've found my way, and matured because I had to.
I belive and know maturity, because I am a 17 year old mother and go to school. Some times it is hard and sometimes not.
Maturity all the way. I was 16 when I had my first baby. She is now 7 years old and gets strait A's in school. Every one at church loves her because she is so polite. And I took care of my baby not my mom not her dad just me. My second child is now 4 months old. And my husband and I are very happy with our girls
Both!
That one is easy: Maturity.
Age is just a number, but maturity is the difference between grown up and being stupid. I know many 20-somethings that are very mature, and they are very grown up with their lives and the way they do things, and I know people in their 40's that are rather immature, party all the time, live with mom and dad, and have that part-time job just for the fun money. So which would you want to have for a parent? Which one will be able to give yout he love, support, and be able to take care of you (if you were their kid)? Maturity by far, is the most important thing.
This is NOT to say that a ';mature'; 16-year-old should go out and get pregnant. I think that life experience is very important as well, and at 16, other than high school and a family vacation or two, what kind of life experience does one have to offer a child? I think that once a person is out of school (whatever level they choose) and has a job and a way to support another, then they can think about a child. They are not like those dolls you see on tv - you can't put a baby in the toy box when you are sick of playing with them. . .
Maturity, but age plays a factor for incme and education. I was a young mother 21, I guess that not that young anymore, but I made a point to work a good job finish school and things like that , but it goes back to maturity.
If it's all about maturity, can't people be ';mature'; enough to wait to have a kid? Or at least be financially secure and not depend on the government and other's money to burden them further? I just don't get it. I know you can be mture, but what good is this when you just graduated high school at most and working a minimum wage job? If you go to college at 17 or 18, that should be your priority instead of raising children. It's alot harder to go to college (statistically and generally speaking) and to raise a baby at the same time. I know I'm probably going to get alot of hype or thumbs down for this but it's true! And you can't report me because this is my opinion and I am certainly entitled to it.
Maturity for sure..... my sister had a baby in high school and she is a great mom who loves and takes care of her child so much better then we were ever taken care of by our parents who were much older. What does age have to do with being a good parent anyway?? 18 or 30 doesn't matter as much as love, commitment and enjoying ones responsibility.
they go hand in hand so both the older you are the more mature you become and the more experience you have.
Maturity. You can be old and foolish. But their is no age to being mature.
maturity, I had my daughter at 18 and me and my husband had it together!! my younger sister on the other hand had hers at 19 and its totally different its hard to tell who the child is you know what i mean.
I would say maturity....but some maturity comes along WITH age...but like another person said, I would rather have had a 16 year old mature mother, than a 26 year old immature mother (which I had neither, just an example)
age with maturity! You can be 28 years old and still not be mature enough to have a child. Just because one is under the age of 18 and mature, does not mean they should have children.
Diffinitely maturity. Hey you can be 40 and not mature enough to raise a child.
I think maturity. I was a young mother but had a lot of maturity in caring for my baby. Age really isn't a factor. Life circumstances can mature a person quickly!
Well with age comes wisdom, so generally speaking they go hand in hand, cuz you're only legal 2 years out of your whole teen/adolescent life.
maturity is more inportant.
maturity. at nineteen i had my first baby, and it was hard, but i have met some people who are in their late twenties and have lost their kids because they aren't mature enough for the responsibilty.
neither is more important. skills is the most important, and to be ready
maturity
age has nothing to do with anything. just how many years you have been on this earth. age will NOT make you a good parent. maturity will. i 23 yr old can be an awesome loving mother while a 35 yr old can not give a damn about her kids.
why do people think age has anything to do with personality or quality of life. its about who you are
Maturity, I have seen parents age 19 that have more sence then a 25 yr old parent.
Niether--------Wisdom is what you need. The most mature person may not be a good parent because they don't know what to do. Age is just that, your age, it has nothing to do with your maturity or experiences. I've learned with wisdom comes a sense of ';maturity regardless of age';, wisdom is what children seek in there questions about the moon and stars at bedtime, what to do about the boy in 3rd period, and should they kiss on the first or 10th date.............Maturity gives you an opinion, wisdom gives you insight. With wisom you know how to help them come to a clear and true answer with you, not from you.
Maturity.. Some older people in their 30s are more immature than younger parents in their teens or early 20s..
Well, maturity usually comes with age, so the two are not separate things.
I believe that to make the best parent you can be you have to be somewhat mature. And I think that its got to be much harder on a younger parent than an older one, not only in mind but also in body. So I would think that you would need both.
They are both equally important. But I would rather have a 20 year old mature parent than a 25 year old immature parent.Which is more important for parenting: maturity or age?
Maturity.
Maturity! I know lots of 30+ year old women who are terrible parents. But be reasonable, I don't care how mature an 18 year old thinks she is, she is too young to be having babies... and that comes from someone who had babies at 19. Now don't get me wrong, I'm a wonderful mom, and there are lots of awesome young moms out there, but I'm mature enough to admit that I was too you ng to have kids. I've found my way, and matured because I had to.
I belive and know maturity, because I am a 17 year old mother and go to school. Some times it is hard and sometimes not.
Maturity all the way. I was 16 when I had my first baby. She is now 7 years old and gets strait A's in school. Every one at church loves her because she is so polite. And I took care of my baby not my mom not her dad just me. My second child is now 4 months old. And my husband and I are very happy with our girls
Both!
That one is easy: Maturity.
Age is just a number, but maturity is the difference between grown up and being stupid. I know many 20-somethings that are very mature, and they are very grown up with their lives and the way they do things, and I know people in their 40's that are rather immature, party all the time, live with mom and dad, and have that part-time job just for the fun money. So which would you want to have for a parent? Which one will be able to give yout he love, support, and be able to take care of you (if you were their kid)? Maturity by far, is the most important thing.
This is NOT to say that a ';mature'; 16-year-old should go out and get pregnant. I think that life experience is very important as well, and at 16, other than high school and a family vacation or two, what kind of life experience does one have to offer a child? I think that once a person is out of school (whatever level they choose) and has a job and a way to support another, then they can think about a child. They are not like those dolls you see on tv - you can't put a baby in the toy box when you are sick of playing with them. . .
Maturity, but age plays a factor for incme and education. I was a young mother 21, I guess that not that young anymore, but I made a point to work a good job finish school and things like that , but it goes back to maturity.
If it's all about maturity, can't people be ';mature'; enough to wait to have a kid? Or at least be financially secure and not depend on the government and other's money to burden them further? I just don't get it. I know you can be mture, but what good is this when you just graduated high school at most and working a minimum wage job? If you go to college at 17 or 18, that should be your priority instead of raising children. It's alot harder to go to college (statistically and generally speaking) and to raise a baby at the same time. I know I'm probably going to get alot of hype or thumbs down for this but it's true! And you can't report me because this is my opinion and I am certainly entitled to it.
Maturity for sure..... my sister had a baby in high school and she is a great mom who loves and takes care of her child so much better then we were ever taken care of by our parents who were much older. What does age have to do with being a good parent anyway?? 18 or 30 doesn't matter as much as love, commitment and enjoying ones responsibility.
they go hand in hand so both the older you are the more mature you become and the more experience you have.
Maturity. You can be old and foolish. But their is no age to being mature.
maturity, I had my daughter at 18 and me and my husband had it together!! my younger sister on the other hand had hers at 19 and its totally different its hard to tell who the child is you know what i mean.
I would say maturity....but some maturity comes along WITH age...but like another person said, I would rather have had a 16 year old mature mother, than a 26 year old immature mother (which I had neither, just an example)
age with maturity! You can be 28 years old and still not be mature enough to have a child. Just because one is under the age of 18 and mature, does not mean they should have children.
Diffinitely maturity. Hey you can be 40 and not mature enough to raise a child.
I think maturity. I was a young mother but had a lot of maturity in caring for my baby. Age really isn't a factor. Life circumstances can mature a person quickly!
Well with age comes wisdom, so generally speaking they go hand in hand, cuz you're only legal 2 years out of your whole teen/adolescent life.
maturity is more inportant.
maturity. at nineteen i had my first baby, and it was hard, but i have met some people who are in their late twenties and have lost their kids because they aren't mature enough for the responsibilty.
neither is more important. skills is the most important, and to be ready
maturity
age has nothing to do with anything. just how many years you have been on this earth. age will NOT make you a good parent. maturity will. i 23 yr old can be an awesome loving mother while a 35 yr old can not give a damn about her kids.
why do people think age has anything to do with personality or quality of life. its about who you are
Maturity, I have seen parents age 19 that have more sence then a 25 yr old parent.
Niether--------Wisdom is what you need. The most mature person may not be a good parent because they don't know what to do. Age is just that, your age, it has nothing to do with your maturity or experiences. I've learned with wisdom comes a sense of ';maturity regardless of age';, wisdom is what children seek in there questions about the moon and stars at bedtime, what to do about the boy in 3rd period, and should they kiss on the first or 10th date.............Maturity gives you an opinion, wisdom gives you insight. With wisom you know how to help them come to a clear and true answer with you, not from you.
Maturity.. Some older people in their 30s are more immature than younger parents in their teens or early 20s..
Well, maturity usually comes with age, so the two are not separate things.
I believe that to make the best parent you can be you have to be somewhat mature. And I think that its got to be much harder on a younger parent than an older one, not only in mind but also in body. So I would think that you would need both.
Can someone give me links to vidoes about the baby think it over program or on teen parenting thanks angela R?
the baby think it over program i have to take one home for 10 weeks with me what will the baby do? what do i have to do ?Can someone give me links to vidoes about the baby think it over program or on teen parenting thanks angela R?
You will receive info from your teacher before you bring him/her home! Good luck! It was a long semester for me!
You will receive info from your teacher before you bring him/her home! Good luck! It was a long semester for me!
From the parenting section, do you choose contacts who?
are similar to you in their parenting, or agree with you on important parenting issues, or who are similar to your real life friends?
or do you choose them notwithstanding your differences because you find them interesting or because they make you laugh?
if your contacts were in a room with your real-life friends, would they hate one another or get along?From the parenting section, do you choose contacts who?
More or less I choose them based on our similarities on the core values of parenting. But I also find that a lot of them (including you!) are overall interesting and kind people, which are attractive qualities.
Then there comes the sense of humor :) Yes those things make a difference too! I'm not sure though if my friends would hate my contacts or not. I think they would like them, but that's for them to decide. I know I like them :)From the parenting section, do you choose contacts who?
I think mine would be a pretty good mix of personalities, and I definitely have different beliefs on some parenting topics than my contacts. I would say that there is actually less diversity amongst my ';real life'; friends than I have on here, and it's part of why I enjoy this- I like hearing different opinions. I choose contacts based on people who I find interesting and seem genuine. I like a good sense of humor, but I really enjoy people who ask thoughtful questions and give well informed thoughtful answers.
None of my real life friends are mothers, so if my contacts who are moms, and my real life friends were in the same room, I doubt they would have anything in common, but my friends, and my contacts are very nice people, so I doubt there would be any confrontation or tension between them.
I don't have a specif formula for contacts. If they have a good rep, and have a sense of humor .... it works, but, who I connect to my network are mostly interesting enough people, or people who are funny %26amp; lax.
I added you to my contacts because I find your questions and answers very insightful and interesting. I don't have anyone else on my contacts (no offense to anyone) from the parenting section. I really mean no offense to anyone, I think a lot of people on here are very insightful in their parenting skills and answers. I will add someone even if their views are different than mine if they can keep my interest. :)
Edit: I must also add that I thoroughly enjoy Mozz. She cracks me up. I just now added her to my contacts, I just hadn't gotten around to it yet. :P
I have a vast variation of friends in Real Life as well as on yahoo...some I agree with as far as parenting style, some I don't, In real life and on yahoo. I'm sure many feel the same about me and I'm fine with that...the people I consider my GOOD friends in real life for the most part we agree on most topics others I keep as acquaintances.
I don't really pick my Contacts for the most part they pick me. I feel that if they have the good sense to PICK ME...they must be ok! (tongue in cheek here Des!)
I believe my close contact/friends WOULD get along well with my Real Life friends.
Based on respect (whether they parent like me or not) and humor doesn't hurt:) There are a few of them that even resemble (personality wise) a few of my real life friends. I think they'd probably get along but as I said the other day, my being ';multifaceted'; lends to me to have some extreme differences in friends.
It started as choosing contacts that had children that were the same age as my son, so we could exchange questions/answers. Then I picked the people that had a great sense of humor and seemed open-minded. I also choose people that consistently give good answers/advice. I have friends from yahoo that I talk to and consider them my real-life friends now.......all combined, I think everyone would get along great. My friends all share one thing in common: being able to laugh at themselves and make me laugh!!
People whose opinions I respect, share similar parenting experiences, or make me pee my pants laughing.
Went toe-to-toe with one of my favorites today in a peanut butter question. But she's still one of my favorite contacts. We can disagree and still appreciate each other's two cents. It's why we're contacts. No room on my list for people who can't hear any one else's voice but their own.
Why thanks Erin, that's nice to read. And Des, you bring it girl. I got iron toes.
i choose my contacts very carefully. i don't have much in fact. :)
originally, i chose contacts according to their backgrounds --if they have kids with disabilities, experience with IEPs and such. then i went for general good and clever Q and As. and finally, i went for those who make me laugh and feel great about hanging out here.
honestly, you guys (my contacts) rock more than my real life friends. lol!
the girls in my contacts are similar but different. we may not use the same ways to raise our kids but our end goal is the same. that to me is what is important.
all of my contacts make me laugh. its a requirement to my contact. that and you must find me hilarious.
i think everyone would love my contacts. i only choose the best. :-)
I have a mixed bag of contacts. Some things we agree on and others we don't. Take you and I for example we don't always agree but you are still a contact and I respect what you say just like you respect what I say, for the most part. It makes for an interesting time on Y!A.
Some are similar, some are different but interesting, and some are funny and make me smile.
If they were all in the same room together, it would be one diverse crowd (but hopefully they would all get along considering most are open-minded, considerate people).
I choose them by their sense of reality, and humor. If they're funny and down to earth, they're my kind of people.
If I had a party with my contacts, they'd be so loaded, they'd all be crying and hugging eachother regardless of their views
Okay.. let's pretend I have real life friends...
Then yea, they would all get along.
Uhm.. actually though, most of my contacts do get along. some are similar but I have only found 1 or people that are a lot like me in parenting or otherwise, anyhow.
To be honest I choose contacts who pick me first. I have yet to take the time to search and find people who are similar to me, etc. So far I do like them all.
I choose the ones who choose me. Doesn't matter what their beliefs are.
I chose them by the answers they give and the meaning they put into their answers.
You have to give respect, to earn it.
I chose you, so it must be because of choice number 2.;-)
And I hope they'd all get along.
What about YOU?
or do you choose them notwithstanding your differences because you find them interesting or because they make you laugh?
if your contacts were in a room with your real-life friends, would they hate one another or get along?From the parenting section, do you choose contacts who?
More or less I choose them based on our similarities on the core values of parenting. But I also find that a lot of them (including you!) are overall interesting and kind people, which are attractive qualities.
Then there comes the sense of humor :) Yes those things make a difference too! I'm not sure though if my friends would hate my contacts or not. I think they would like them, but that's for them to decide. I know I like them :)From the parenting section, do you choose contacts who?
I think mine would be a pretty good mix of personalities, and I definitely have different beliefs on some parenting topics than my contacts. I would say that there is actually less diversity amongst my ';real life'; friends than I have on here, and it's part of why I enjoy this- I like hearing different opinions. I choose contacts based on people who I find interesting and seem genuine. I like a good sense of humor, but I really enjoy people who ask thoughtful questions and give well informed thoughtful answers.
None of my real life friends are mothers, so if my contacts who are moms, and my real life friends were in the same room, I doubt they would have anything in common, but my friends, and my contacts are very nice people, so I doubt there would be any confrontation or tension between them.
I don't have a specif formula for contacts. If they have a good rep, and have a sense of humor .... it works, but, who I connect to my network are mostly interesting enough people, or people who are funny %26amp; lax.
I added you to my contacts because I find your questions and answers very insightful and interesting. I don't have anyone else on my contacts (no offense to anyone) from the parenting section. I really mean no offense to anyone, I think a lot of people on here are very insightful in their parenting skills and answers. I will add someone even if their views are different than mine if they can keep my interest. :)
Edit: I must also add that I thoroughly enjoy Mozz. She cracks me up. I just now added her to my contacts, I just hadn't gotten around to it yet. :P
I have a vast variation of friends in Real Life as well as on yahoo...some I agree with as far as parenting style, some I don't, In real life and on yahoo. I'm sure many feel the same about me and I'm fine with that...the people I consider my GOOD friends in real life for the most part we agree on most topics others I keep as acquaintances.
I don't really pick my Contacts for the most part they pick me. I feel that if they have the good sense to PICK ME...they must be ok! (tongue in cheek here Des!)
I believe my close contact/friends WOULD get along well with my Real Life friends.
Based on respect (whether they parent like me or not) and humor doesn't hurt:) There are a few of them that even resemble (personality wise) a few of my real life friends. I think they'd probably get along but as I said the other day, my being ';multifaceted'; lends to me to have some extreme differences in friends.
It started as choosing contacts that had children that were the same age as my son, so we could exchange questions/answers. Then I picked the people that had a great sense of humor and seemed open-minded. I also choose people that consistently give good answers/advice. I have friends from yahoo that I talk to and consider them my real-life friends now.......all combined, I think everyone would get along great. My friends all share one thing in common: being able to laugh at themselves and make me laugh!!
People whose opinions I respect, share similar parenting experiences, or make me pee my pants laughing.
Went toe-to-toe with one of my favorites today in a peanut butter question. But she's still one of my favorite contacts. We can disagree and still appreciate each other's two cents. It's why we're contacts. No room on my list for people who can't hear any one else's voice but their own.
Why thanks Erin, that's nice to read. And Des, you bring it girl. I got iron toes.
i choose my contacts very carefully. i don't have much in fact. :)
originally, i chose contacts according to their backgrounds --if they have kids with disabilities, experience with IEPs and such. then i went for general good and clever Q and As. and finally, i went for those who make me laugh and feel great about hanging out here.
honestly, you guys (my contacts) rock more than my real life friends. lol!
the girls in my contacts are similar but different. we may not use the same ways to raise our kids but our end goal is the same. that to me is what is important.
all of my contacts make me laugh. its a requirement to my contact. that and you must find me hilarious.
i think everyone would love my contacts. i only choose the best. :-)
I have a mixed bag of contacts. Some things we agree on and others we don't. Take you and I for example we don't always agree but you are still a contact and I respect what you say just like you respect what I say, for the most part. It makes for an interesting time on Y!A.
Some are similar, some are different but interesting, and some are funny and make me smile.
If they were all in the same room together, it would be one diverse crowd (but hopefully they would all get along considering most are open-minded, considerate people).
I choose them by their sense of reality, and humor. If they're funny and down to earth, they're my kind of people.
If I had a party with my contacts, they'd be so loaded, they'd all be crying and hugging eachother regardless of their views
Okay.. let's pretend I have real life friends...
Then yea, they would all get along.
Uhm.. actually though, most of my contacts do get along. some are similar but I have only found 1 or people that are a lot like me in parenting or otherwise, anyhow.
To be honest I choose contacts who pick me first. I have yet to take the time to search and find people who are similar to me, etc. So far I do like them all.
I choose the ones who choose me. Doesn't matter what their beliefs are.
I chose them by the answers they give and the meaning they put into their answers.
You have to give respect, to earn it.
I chose you, so it must be because of choice number 2.;-)
And I hope they'd all get along.
What about YOU?
What's your opinion on sperm donation as a parenting option for single women/lesbians?
UnnaturalWhat's your opinion on sperm donation as a parenting option for single women/lesbians?
Selfish. Children are human beings and gifts from God, not objects we have a right to. Children need both a mother and a father. To intentionally conceive a child under these circumstances is wrong.What's your opinion on sperm donation as a parenting option for single women/lesbians?
Go for it. In the same way I encourage those who wish to donate eggs to do so, I encourage those who wish to donate sperm to do so. You're giving someone the blessing of children.
Whatever works.
If a woman has the capacity to love and care for a child, why not? I have offered my spouse as a donor to close lesbian friends.
.
its fine with me. ill even donate.
I don't think any women will donate any sperm.
If they are stable people who are capable of raising kids, why not?
i think it's a wonderful idea
Selfish. Children are human beings and gifts from God, not objects we have a right to. Children need both a mother and a father. To intentionally conceive a child under these circumstances is wrong.What's your opinion on sperm donation as a parenting option for single women/lesbians?
Go for it. In the same way I encourage those who wish to donate eggs to do so, I encourage those who wish to donate sperm to do so. You're giving someone the blessing of children.
Whatever works.
If a woman has the capacity to love and care for a child, why not? I have offered my spouse as a donor to close lesbian friends.
.
its fine with me. ill even donate.
I don't think any women will donate any sperm.
If they are stable people who are capable of raising kids, why not?
i think it's a wonderful idea
Single dad looking for friend to talk to ,parenting issues,?
Single dad looking for friend to talk to ,parenting issues,past relationship mistakes and ..
how to make things better when your ready to move on,etc,etc.Single dad looking for friend to talk to ,parenting issues,?
Sounds tough I'm always here to talk. What happened? When your ready to move on go out and have fun.Single dad looking for friend to talk to ,parenting issues,?
how long have you been on your own? It can take a while to get things back on even keel. There is no time limit, you need time for yourself, time to think about what you want, what you children would like. Start by talking to them see how they feel at this time,they will all have different feelings and thoughts. They are now your top of the list. Don't worry about past mistakes we all make them, and will always make them even in the future.If you would like to talk, i will answer you when i can, haveing kids myself, they hog this laptop 24/7, so have to wait in line.speak to you soon.
Its not easy bringing up children on your own. I am lucky to be married but kids are hard work, a sense of humor and a sense of fair play is what is needed. My friends tell me that I am good with kids and have a lot of wisdom, whatever that means, I think most of the time its common sense and always go with your gut feeling.
If you want to email me I am happy to pass on my wisdom and experiences, and also to encourage you through a sense of humour.
Remember to take care of you, if you feel good about yourself then you will pass this good energy on to your kids. Good luck.
I'm here if you need someone to talk. I'm a single mom so we may be going through some of the same things. :)
its hard being a single parent I dont mind chatting you need me just IM me Snuzy75
how to make things better when your ready to move on,etc,etc.Single dad looking for friend to talk to ,parenting issues,?
Sounds tough I'm always here to talk. What happened? When your ready to move on go out and have fun.Single dad looking for friend to talk to ,parenting issues,?
how long have you been on your own? It can take a while to get things back on even keel. There is no time limit, you need time for yourself, time to think about what you want, what you children would like. Start by talking to them see how they feel at this time,they will all have different feelings and thoughts. They are now your top of the list. Don't worry about past mistakes we all make them, and will always make them even in the future.If you would like to talk, i will answer you when i can, haveing kids myself, they hog this laptop 24/7, so have to wait in line.speak to you soon.
Its not easy bringing up children on your own. I am lucky to be married but kids are hard work, a sense of humor and a sense of fair play is what is needed. My friends tell me that I am good with kids and have a lot of wisdom, whatever that means, I think most of the time its common sense and always go with your gut feeling.
If you want to email me I am happy to pass on my wisdom and experiences, and also to encourage you through a sense of humour.
Remember to take care of you, if you feel good about yourself then you will pass this good energy on to your kids. Good luck.
I'm here if you need someone to talk. I'm a single mom so we may be going through some of the same things. :)
its hard being a single parent I dont mind chatting you need me just IM me Snuzy75
Why does she make comments about my parenting skills?
my little boy is a late talker which has led to some behavourial problems.he's under a speech therapist, a pediatrician and is in one of the best private nurserys in my area. i love him to pieces and wouldnt have him any other way.he makes me laugh and i love being his mum. but there are certain situations i avoid like shopping with my boy cos he hates it and when he has a tantrum he punches kicks scream pulls my hair pinches . but my mates just had a baby and when i went to see her the other night she asked if my son had been xmas shopping with me, i said no. she replyed,' do you take him anywhere?' but she always makes sly comments like i might not take him to this christening cos he wont sit still etc but she thinks im being mean. i take my son everywhere but wont put him in a situation that gets him stressed. ive tryed to explain but shes an idiot and doesnt listen. ive decidied not to bother with her anymore for fear of punching her. my son is 3.am i right or wrong?Why does she make comments about my parenting skills?
my daughter just turned 3 and has been in speech for 18 months now. we are starting the DD Preschool at the end of january. so i know exactly how you feel. we had a horrible time when she was younger and she wanted stuff. she would get really upset because we couldn't understand her. there were some neighbors who's kids were the same age and they would make comments about it, like we didn't punish her most of the time when she threw a fit, because it was out of frustration. so people thought we were spoiling her. my father in law made a comment once and i went off on him. and now he understands. i know exactly how you feel, and i would not be around this woman anymore. she is rude and has no idea what she is talking about. keeping your son happy is what matters right now, and there is plenty of time later, when he starts talking more, to take him shopping.Why does she make comments about my parenting skills?
your child is going through a normal stage in his he will grow out of it so don't worry about what other idots say.
i think that your friend doesn't understand that you are doing this for your sons benefit and not your own my son hates food shopping he will scream the hole time if i take him with me so i don't take him i think that you friend will realise what your doing when her little one gets to that age don't worry tho you are doing whats best for your child theres nothing wrong with that and if she is a true friend then she will come around good luck and merry Xmas
It's obvious that you love your child. Think of this from HER perspective...she is a new Mom. She loves and adores her child just as much as you do yours. The christening is all about HER baby, not yours. She doesn't want your child to fuss and carry on and take attention away from her baby. You only get christened once in your life. Would you want YOUR child's christening destroyed because of an unruly 3 yr old?
Reckon you're right.... she needs to butt out x
well she should mind her own buisness. You have to learn to be assertive without losing your cool. Try to be even tempered when around your son, children do copy our behaviour. children do have tantrums as well, its embrassing i know. my grandson goes mad sometimes. try to remain calm but firm read a good chilcare book. Get as much knowlege as you can. We all need knowlege. You are doing a good job, dont, let this person bover you. You do not need to explain yourself to her, she is no expert, some people are critical of others to elevate themselves. you did the best thing ignoring her she is not worth it, and probably doing it to someone else now.
it hard enough being a mum but its harder for a mum with special needs/behaviour problems and i know what i talking about because i have 2 special needs children poeple understand when there not in our situation so you have to be patient with there smug arrogance attitudes and comments i have plenty of poeple putting me down about my parenting even there dad just be strong and ignore your friend
for the most part, I think you're right on this one. seems to me, it's none of her business on how you raise your child.
cause she thinks you're not doing it right.
You sound like a lovely mum. Not wanting to put your son in a stressful situation is perfectly reasonable. Im sure that your friend will understand once her newborn is older, my son is 3 in may, Ive learnt so much in the past 2 and a half years and many opinions i had before becoming a parent have changed completely. I understand alot more now and she will too. A friend of a friend recently gave birth. She has already apologised for a few things she just didnt get before she had her own child. She'll learn. In the mean time keep doing what your doing. Enjoy your little man, they grow so fast dont they!! Have a wonderful christmas together xx
you are completely in the right, what makes you think you need a so called friend like this at your little chaps expense? you are a happy mother to him, all kids have their quirks, some harder to deal with than others but generally they all grow out of them, my old gran used to say-they're all the same when they go to school, meaning they all grow and mature at different rates but level out at some point. lets hope your friends baby grows up to be the perfect cherub she is expecting, because when she looks around for a friends advice, you'll be off somewhere nice enjoying your little lads company!!!!! good luck to you
It's envy! Hehe. Fact is, it isn't easy accepting that your child has a problem that easily for some people. Your friend is probably jealous that, despite your lovely son's difficulties, you love him and care for him no matter what. Would she love her baby the same if he/she had the same difficulties? I think you're a great parent and are doing the right thing. Don't let things like this upset you so much. You should be confident that you're doing a great job as a mother and a friend to your son.
Trust me that it has nothing to do with whether you're doing something wrong or not. I began talking before I was even a year old and before a lot of babies did. By the time I was two I could speak both English and Spanish in complete sentences, but I took forever in learning how to walk because I was apparently afraid of falling(I've been a klutz my entire life). Everyone criticized her like crazy for it and said that she was spoiling me and yada yada. Since I could speak so clearly and actually ask for what I wanted instead of running around for it, it only made people think I was making my mother a slave. Well, I walk just fine today and I'm not a spoiled brat like they used to say. Hehe, so be happy. You're little boy will be alright. =D
You know your son the best and what he can handle. She will understand when her child gets older. Sometimes it's easier to just leave your child home. I know there are situations where my kids and I would enjoy ourselves more if they stay home. It can be very stressful wondering if they will behave the way you want them to. Stick to your gut feeling, and ignore her. Give her four years, she will understand then where you were coming from.
You know your child best. Just tell her every child is different, but I agree that if all she does is cause you stress, just drop her. Tell her you need a friend, not a teacher.
you're right.
You are right.
Follow your heart - do what you think is right
Merry Xmas
There is no reason to end your friendship with this other mother. Simply tell her that ALL children are individuals and not ';cookie cutter'; children and all should be raised accordingly. Say to her that she may expect HER child to be a carbon copy of someone else's child and that HER parenting skills simply mirror those of others but you prefer the individual approach of treating YOUR child according to his behavior.
For one the fact that he is your child gives you the right to take him where ever you want w/o being questioned, by anyone, let alone a supposed friend. And I agree w/ you, that you should only take him places he won't be as stressed, b/c it's for his own well-being. She makes it sound like you pen him up, like an animal. I wouldn't hang out w/ someone that thinks that lowly of me either.
You are definately right!! Your son's happiness and security of obviously your main concern, and if those around you don't even try to understand the situation, then you are better off without them around him! Its amazing how many people out there think that they are perfect and that their kids are perfect! There is no such thing!! Guaranteed, your friends child will also reach the age of 2/3, and tantrums are a thing she IS going to encounter! Avoiding situations that stress your son is good, I did that with my son ... I found that unknown people and crowds triggered him off! Good luck and stick by your feelings!
she's making comments to let you know a 3 year old child should be able to sit still and behave
Forget the current situation in the Middle East, for true rivalry watch mums.estee lauder
my daughter just turned 3 and has been in speech for 18 months now. we are starting the DD Preschool at the end of january. so i know exactly how you feel. we had a horrible time when she was younger and she wanted stuff. she would get really upset because we couldn't understand her. there were some neighbors who's kids were the same age and they would make comments about it, like we didn't punish her most of the time when she threw a fit, because it was out of frustration. so people thought we were spoiling her. my father in law made a comment once and i went off on him. and now he understands. i know exactly how you feel, and i would not be around this woman anymore. she is rude and has no idea what she is talking about. keeping your son happy is what matters right now, and there is plenty of time later, when he starts talking more, to take him shopping.Why does she make comments about my parenting skills?
your child is going through a normal stage in his he will grow out of it so don't worry about what other idots say.
i think that your friend doesn't understand that you are doing this for your sons benefit and not your own my son hates food shopping he will scream the hole time if i take him with me so i don't take him i think that you friend will realise what your doing when her little one gets to that age don't worry tho you are doing whats best for your child theres nothing wrong with that and if she is a true friend then she will come around good luck and merry Xmas
It's obvious that you love your child. Think of this from HER perspective...she is a new Mom. She loves and adores her child just as much as you do yours. The christening is all about HER baby, not yours. She doesn't want your child to fuss and carry on and take attention away from her baby. You only get christened once in your life. Would you want YOUR child's christening destroyed because of an unruly 3 yr old?
Reckon you're right.... she needs to butt out x
well she should mind her own buisness. You have to learn to be assertive without losing your cool. Try to be even tempered when around your son, children do copy our behaviour. children do have tantrums as well, its embrassing i know. my grandson goes mad sometimes. try to remain calm but firm read a good chilcare book. Get as much knowlege as you can. We all need knowlege. You are doing a good job, dont, let this person bover you. You do not need to explain yourself to her, she is no expert, some people are critical of others to elevate themselves. you did the best thing ignoring her she is not worth it, and probably doing it to someone else now.
it hard enough being a mum but its harder for a mum with special needs/behaviour problems and i know what i talking about because i have 2 special needs children poeple understand when there not in our situation so you have to be patient with there smug arrogance attitudes and comments i have plenty of poeple putting me down about my parenting even there dad just be strong and ignore your friend
for the most part, I think you're right on this one. seems to me, it's none of her business on how you raise your child.
cause she thinks you're not doing it right.
You sound like a lovely mum. Not wanting to put your son in a stressful situation is perfectly reasonable. Im sure that your friend will understand once her newborn is older, my son is 3 in may, Ive learnt so much in the past 2 and a half years and many opinions i had before becoming a parent have changed completely. I understand alot more now and she will too. A friend of a friend recently gave birth. She has already apologised for a few things she just didnt get before she had her own child. She'll learn. In the mean time keep doing what your doing. Enjoy your little man, they grow so fast dont they!! Have a wonderful christmas together xx
you are completely in the right, what makes you think you need a so called friend like this at your little chaps expense? you are a happy mother to him, all kids have their quirks, some harder to deal with than others but generally they all grow out of them, my old gran used to say-they're all the same when they go to school, meaning they all grow and mature at different rates but level out at some point. lets hope your friends baby grows up to be the perfect cherub she is expecting, because when she looks around for a friends advice, you'll be off somewhere nice enjoying your little lads company!!!!! good luck to you
It's envy! Hehe. Fact is, it isn't easy accepting that your child has a problem that easily for some people. Your friend is probably jealous that, despite your lovely son's difficulties, you love him and care for him no matter what. Would she love her baby the same if he/she had the same difficulties? I think you're a great parent and are doing the right thing. Don't let things like this upset you so much. You should be confident that you're doing a great job as a mother and a friend to your son.
Trust me that it has nothing to do with whether you're doing something wrong or not. I began talking before I was even a year old and before a lot of babies did. By the time I was two I could speak both English and Spanish in complete sentences, but I took forever in learning how to walk because I was apparently afraid of falling(I've been a klutz my entire life). Everyone criticized her like crazy for it and said that she was spoiling me and yada yada. Since I could speak so clearly and actually ask for what I wanted instead of running around for it, it only made people think I was making my mother a slave. Well, I walk just fine today and I'm not a spoiled brat like they used to say. Hehe, so be happy. You're little boy will be alright. =D
You know your son the best and what he can handle. She will understand when her child gets older. Sometimes it's easier to just leave your child home. I know there are situations where my kids and I would enjoy ourselves more if they stay home. It can be very stressful wondering if they will behave the way you want them to. Stick to your gut feeling, and ignore her. Give her four years, she will understand then where you were coming from.
You know your child best. Just tell her every child is different, but I agree that if all she does is cause you stress, just drop her. Tell her you need a friend, not a teacher.
you're right.
You are right.
Follow your heart - do what you think is right
Merry Xmas
There is no reason to end your friendship with this other mother. Simply tell her that ALL children are individuals and not ';cookie cutter'; children and all should be raised accordingly. Say to her that she may expect HER child to be a carbon copy of someone else's child and that HER parenting skills simply mirror those of others but you prefer the individual approach of treating YOUR child according to his behavior.
For one the fact that he is your child gives you the right to take him where ever you want w/o being questioned, by anyone, let alone a supposed friend. And I agree w/ you, that you should only take him places he won't be as stressed, b/c it's for his own well-being. She makes it sound like you pen him up, like an animal. I wouldn't hang out w/ someone that thinks that lowly of me either.
You are definately right!! Your son's happiness and security of obviously your main concern, and if those around you don't even try to understand the situation, then you are better off without them around him! Its amazing how many people out there think that they are perfect and that their kids are perfect! There is no such thing!! Guaranteed, your friends child will also reach the age of 2/3, and tantrums are a thing she IS going to encounter! Avoiding situations that stress your son is good, I did that with my son ... I found that unknown people and crowds triggered him off! Good luck and stick by your feelings!
she's making comments to let you know a 3 year old child should be able to sit still and behave
Forget the current situation in the Middle East, for true rivalry watch mums.
Parenting magazine says normal 4-12 mo old babies poop 3 times a day? Is this true??
My son has problems pooping and during a good week either goes once a day or every other day. Is this not enough? I can't imagine him pooping that much. Every once and a while after he's been constipated for a while he will 2-3 times, but not regularly.Parenting magazine says normal 4-12 mo old babies poop 3 times a day? Is this true??
My breastfed baby went once every 3 or 4 days, which was perfectly normal for her. Once she started solids she started going once every other day perhaps, and now that she's 2yrs old she usually goes once a day. Compare adults, we don't all go the same frequency either... it's not constipation unless it's difficult to pass when he does go. Frequency (i.e. Not often) is not an indicator.Parenting magazine says normal 4-12 mo old babies poop 3 times a day? Is this true??
Normal magazines tend to generalize.
My baby poops 3 times a week and she's pretty normal.
My daughter never goes 2-3 times a day. Her normal is usually one but every once in a while 2 times. Every baby is different though.
At LEAST! I've CHANGED some babies who went more often than THAT- so consider yourself lucky (%26amp; if he's old enough, give him alittle Orange Juice in a bottle for his Constipation).
Sure, some normal baies poop 3 times a day. Some normal babies poop 8 times a day. Some normal babies poop once a day. Some normal babies poop once a week.
There's a wide range of normal.
my 7 month old gooes once sometimes twice a day now that she is on baby food but when she was exclusively breastfed she would go days with out any and that was normal
I'd like to know what they are feeding these normal babies! I have just started introducing solids to my 4 1/2 month old and he still only poos once a day to every other day.
Normal is a cycle on a washing machine.
no way...they poop that and more for the first few months, but around 4 to 12 months, they usually poop once a day, maybe twice. as they get bigger, their digestive track matures and gets bigger and can hold more. it's not even uncommon for kids to go every other day or every few days when their younger. unless your overfeeding your kids, once a day or every other day is normal.
that seems like a lot, none of my kids have pooped that much aside from when they were first born.
My breastfed baby went once every 3 or 4 days, which was perfectly normal for her. Once she started solids she started going once every other day perhaps, and now that she's 2yrs old she usually goes once a day. Compare adults, we don't all go the same frequency either... it's not constipation unless it's difficult to pass when he does go. Frequency (i.e. Not often) is not an indicator.Parenting magazine says normal 4-12 mo old babies poop 3 times a day? Is this true??
Normal magazines tend to generalize.
My baby poops 3 times a week and she's pretty normal.
My daughter never goes 2-3 times a day. Her normal is usually one but every once in a while 2 times. Every baby is different though.
At LEAST! I've CHANGED some babies who went more often than THAT- so consider yourself lucky (%26amp; if he's old enough, give him alittle Orange Juice in a bottle for his Constipation).
Sure, some normal baies poop 3 times a day. Some normal babies poop 8 times a day. Some normal babies poop once a day. Some normal babies poop once a week.
There's a wide range of normal.
my 7 month old gooes once sometimes twice a day now that she is on baby food but when she was exclusively breastfed she would go days with out any and that was normal
I'd like to know what they are feeding these normal babies! I have just started introducing solids to my 4 1/2 month old and he still only poos once a day to every other day.
Normal is a cycle on a washing machine.
no way...they poop that and more for the first few months, but around 4 to 12 months, they usually poop once a day, maybe twice. as they get bigger, their digestive track matures and gets bigger and can hold more. it's not even uncommon for kids to go every other day or every few days when their younger. unless your overfeeding your kids, once a day or every other day is normal.
that seems like a lot, none of my kids have pooped that much aside from when they were first born.
What is your BEST parenting skill?
This is just a free-for-all, a chance to share your greatest success, your favorite tip, your shining moment. We can all stand to learn how to do something better :)What is your BEST parenting skill?
Lots of communicationWhat is your BEST parenting skill?
Unconditional Love.
I love my children no matter what.
I always tried to remember what it was like to be their age and be as understanding and reasonable as a parent could be.
My patience. When my daughter has a tantrum, I don't fly off the handle, even though I've wanted to many times.
Try to be their friend, I did not say their best friend, but try to always want the best for them in everything. Know that their life at school is not a bed of roses, whether they express that to you or not, be there to listen and give lots of hugs and smiles, always kiss them good night and try hard to not yell a lot at them
My son knows he's able to talk to me about anything. I just hope our honest relationship lasts through his teen years.
ive learned that if you simply spank your chilren when thy do bad, youll have a great kid, a opposed to not spankin them and when theyre older, youll either have to beat them or theyll walk all over you.
As a single mother of a 10yr old daughter and a 15yr old son.....I'd have to say my best parenting skill is to talk with my children about anything and everything and I am willing to stop what I am doing at the moment, look them in the eye and listen to them.
A Big Paddle lol.
Being the boss! Just kidding, LOL!
I believe that the best thing that I have done for my daughter so far is paying as much attention to her as possible. This includes answering all of her questions, watching her do something that she wants me to see, showing her how to do things the right way instead of telling her, and always knowing what she was in to at that moment.
I think that my daughter is as smart as she is today because of this. I wanted her to know that I was always there and available if she needed anything, and I was always interested in what she was doing. She still asks questions about everything and I am honest with her.(as honest as I can be at 5)
As parents we have all done things that we regret or wish we had done differently, but this is one thing that I feel is very important to the developement of any child. I am proud of the fact that she knows that I am always there to help her through whatever, and that I love her, no matter what. Whatever I have going on can be put on hold for just a few minutes to let her know that she is special and I care about her and whatever is important to her.
My ability to be ';the bad guy';. My wife is the good cop and I am the bad cop. I figure that one of us has to be the hard a@# so i elected myself to be it.
I feel that my best parenting skill would be always being there for my child no matter what. If it is a bad day or good. Sometimes taking a ride just the two of us to talk or sitting at the table to carry on a conversation and not in front of the TV all the time. When it's silent and they don't have other things to distract there mind they will open up to you if you just listen to them. Always Be there to listen to them be concerned about what they say to you because when they are little they look up to us and learn by example. Always teach them manners and how to respect others.
Be open,honest, and let them know HOW THE BEAR SHITS IN THE WOODS.Be sweet but firm.Just let them know THE RULES.
Unconditional love; even in the face of disobedience and great disappointment.
We need to convey to our children that while we may not uphold them in wrong doing, they always have our undying love and support, no matter what they do or don't do.
If everyone knew they were guaranteed this one sure thing, personal growth and redemption would not be so difficult for so many people when they stray from the right path in life.
Love covers a multitude of sins! God is love. If he can forgive me, his child, anything; so much more should I be able to forgive the child that he gave life through me.
I just don't understand people who withold love or permanently disown their children for any reason.
Mine was always sleeping. When I was sleeping, I could not possibly say or do anything that would screw up my child's psyche.
my shining moment is when I joined yahoo answers
am ...am...I..
tears in my eyes :(
Listening to my son, and doing all I can for him, whenever I can.
Spend time with them when they are children.
Give time to them when they are teenagers.
Enjoy their friendship when they are adults.
Two really, communication and leading by example.
My daughter is adopted, from another culture. She is the happiest child ever. But it was not always the roses . The best parenting skills I would say I practiced are: honesty, patience, positive motivation, constantly maintaining her self-esteem.
My best parenting skill I think is I get in the floor with my daughter and play the games she wants to play. Or when she wants to be princess I get to be queen. She tells me I have to be a nice queen not the mommy queen.
Lots of communicationWhat is your BEST parenting skill?
Unconditional Love.
I love my children no matter what.
I always tried to remember what it was like to be their age and be as understanding and reasonable as a parent could be.
My patience. When my daughter has a tantrum, I don't fly off the handle, even though I've wanted to many times.
Try to be their friend, I did not say their best friend, but try to always want the best for them in everything. Know that their life at school is not a bed of roses, whether they express that to you or not, be there to listen and give lots of hugs and smiles, always kiss them good night and try hard to not yell a lot at them
My son knows he's able to talk to me about anything. I just hope our honest relationship lasts through his teen years.
ive learned that if you simply spank your chilren when thy do bad, youll have a great kid, a opposed to not spankin them and when theyre older, youll either have to beat them or theyll walk all over you.
As a single mother of a 10yr old daughter and a 15yr old son.....I'd have to say my best parenting skill is to talk with my children about anything and everything and I am willing to stop what I am doing at the moment, look them in the eye and listen to them.
A Big Paddle lol.
Being the boss! Just kidding, LOL!
I believe that the best thing that I have done for my daughter so far is paying as much attention to her as possible. This includes answering all of her questions, watching her do something that she wants me to see, showing her how to do things the right way instead of telling her, and always knowing what she was in to at that moment.
I think that my daughter is as smart as she is today because of this. I wanted her to know that I was always there and available if she needed anything, and I was always interested in what she was doing. She still asks questions about everything and I am honest with her.(as honest as I can be at 5)
As parents we have all done things that we regret or wish we had done differently, but this is one thing that I feel is very important to the developement of any child. I am proud of the fact that she knows that I am always there to help her through whatever, and that I love her, no matter what. Whatever I have going on can be put on hold for just a few minutes to let her know that she is special and I care about her and whatever is important to her.
My ability to be ';the bad guy';. My wife is the good cop and I am the bad cop. I figure that one of us has to be the hard a@# so i elected myself to be it.
I feel that my best parenting skill would be always being there for my child no matter what. If it is a bad day or good. Sometimes taking a ride just the two of us to talk or sitting at the table to carry on a conversation and not in front of the TV all the time. When it's silent and they don't have other things to distract there mind they will open up to you if you just listen to them. Always Be there to listen to them be concerned about what they say to you because when they are little they look up to us and learn by example. Always teach them manners and how to respect others.
Be open,honest, and let them know HOW THE BEAR SHITS IN THE WOODS.Be sweet but firm.Just let them know THE RULES.
Unconditional love; even in the face of disobedience and great disappointment.
We need to convey to our children that while we may not uphold them in wrong doing, they always have our undying love and support, no matter what they do or don't do.
If everyone knew they were guaranteed this one sure thing, personal growth and redemption would not be so difficult for so many people when they stray from the right path in life.
Love covers a multitude of sins! God is love. If he can forgive me, his child, anything; so much more should I be able to forgive the child that he gave life through me.
I just don't understand people who withold love or permanently disown their children for any reason.
Mine was always sleeping. When I was sleeping, I could not possibly say or do anything that would screw up my child's psyche.
my shining moment is when I joined yahoo answers
am ...am...I..
tears in my eyes :(
Listening to my son, and doing all I can for him, whenever I can.
Spend time with them when they are children.
Give time to them when they are teenagers.
Enjoy their friendship when they are adults.
Two really, communication and leading by example.
My daughter is adopted, from another culture. She is the happiest child ever. But it was not always the roses . The best parenting skills I would say I practiced are: honesty, patience, positive motivation, constantly maintaining her self-esteem.
My best parenting skill I think is I get in the floor with my daughter and play the games she wants to play. Or when she wants to be princess I get to be queen. She tells me I have to be a nice queen not the mommy queen.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)